I hate being the "average guy" at parties

[BackUpOrGetStng]

I'm not arguing with that, I'm just saying I don't think this kind of mindset should be encouraged (mindset, not behavior: there's nothing wrong with the behavior per se). Instead of "feeding her" shots, have a few drinks with her. Instead of "grabbing her ass", after making sure she's happy to do it, exchange sexually provocative contact with her. It's the same things, but in a different, non-sexist mindset.

It's the same thing, you said it yourself. Your euphemisms don't change a thing.

Michelle, are you sorority girl who frequents frat parties? If not, then the advice doesn't target you. I love all of your hypothetical scenarios where you beat people up. I know you're Irish, but humor me, how many fights have you been in?

[searock]

It's the same thing, you said it yourself. Your euphemisms don't change a thing.

The same thing but with different intentions, looks in the eyes, respect and not without having consent before touching another person. A woman senses those differences, she won't feel like she's being objectified and degraded, and other women and men that witness the flirting sense it too, and it's just better for everyone.

Here's an example of an extreme but not rare consequence of behaving like young women at parties are pieces of meat on the false impression that they all "want it": http://everydayfeminism.com/2012/11/how-i-became-a-rape-victim/

[michelle23]

Michelle, are you sorority girl who frequents frat parties? If not, then the advice doesn't target you. I love all of your hypothetical scenarios where you beat people up. I know you're Irish, but humor me, how many fights have you been in?

Nope Im not a sorority girl lol. You know many girls enjoy being treated like pieces of meat-usually the insecure, ugly ones coz they don't get much attention. If that's what they want and there are a few male sluts around who want to give it to them-fine by me.. as long as those male sluts don't insult me by thinking they stand a chance with me coz they don't lol. Im the same as Sea. I want a confident, high self esteem, nice guy who treats me like my poop smells of roses.. and he does

I have been in two fights with girls, 3 with men lol I didn't say Id beat anyone up though haha. I just said Id slap him or elbow him. I have arms like twigs so I wouldnt do too much damage haha

[bolatola]

How is what I suggested that he do tricking anyone? I told him to get really drunk and start grabbing. What PUA bs did I suggest? That show was garbage.

As for it not being a choice, it is. If you don't want to do something, don't do it. It really is that simple. I also don't think it is inherently damaging to act like that, if the attention is what you want.

I disagree it is a choice. My opinion is when someone has a choice then he is aware of it and he can weigh between the options and think about which one to choose. These girls never did that.

It was simply imposed on them, maybe some accepted it normally, maybe some really didnt feel great about it but still did it, but I wouldn't call that having a choice.

[TablesandChairs]

If all the girls you are attracted to prefer white/tall/Brad Pitt type men, then that's tough luck. I'm 5'11 - which for a woman is kinda huge. If I decided to hang out at the 'we love short women club' (should a place like that exist...), then I wouldn't be complaining that no one found me attractive.

You're dealing with girls who have a certain 'type' and that type isn't you. So, the onus is on you to change your 'scene'. You've tried sorority girls - no luck. Try something else. Tastes differ as you mature so the same girls, in 1-2-3 years time, will have broader tastes in respect to who they date and find attractive but for now, it is what it is.

[karmacake]

If all the girls you are attracted to prefer white/tall/Brad Pitt type men, then that's tough luck. I'm 5'11 - which for a woman is kinda huge. If I decided to hang out at the 'we love short women club' (should a place like that exist...), then I wouldn't be complaining that no one found me attractive.

You're dealing with girls who have a certain 'type' and that type isn't you. So, the onus is on you to change your 'scene'. You've tried sorority girls - no luck. Try something else. Tastes differ as you mature so the same girls, in 1-2-3 years time, will have broader tastes in respect to who they date and find attractive but for now, it is what it is.

I guess I see what youre saying. But a lot of my friends have told me that there are "more fish in the sea" when it comes to sorority girls. I mean, we only had one party and that was my pledge celebration and there were only 15 girls. But later in the year there will be more and I'm just hoping things will be different :/

[searock]

So I guess you won't consider meeting girls other than at parties?

[Wakeup]

I hate being the average guy at parties

Then stop going to them.

You might find meetmarketadventures.com more of a fun way to meet single woman also looking to meet single men but it's not a dating site. You actually do things as singles and you mingle while you're doing them. Maybe you wouldn't be the "average" guy there.

[karmacake]

So I guess you won't consider meeting girls other than at parties?

Well of course I will. I'm mainly talking about the girls that attend the parties though. They are a whole different animal and I just wanted to talk about them since I am now in a fraternity and the majority of my interaction with girls will be those in the Sororities.

[searock]

You are limiting your pool for no reason... just because you're in a fraternity doesn't mean you can't date girls that aren't in a sorority.

[anonymous..]

wow you sound like a loser