So she's not a virgin anymore...

[cbad]

Actually, if you read the thread, you can see that as soon as the OP asked his question, she immediately started in with her talk about how a woman having sexual intercourse doesn't change anything and nobody should think it does. Like I said, her view of sexuality is completely different than the OPs and therefore, it probably doesn't present him with anything meaningful. Basically, she's just spent the entire thread trying to convince him to not care about this other girl having sex because SHE doesn't care about this other girl having sex. That's why her (and your) advice is totally irrelevant.

[toknow]

Uh... how does her not being a virgin anymore (which is totally normal btw) have anything to do with your "being alone and without any love" o.O?

So what if she's not a virgin? Most people aren't virgins, yet they find partners and love every day. It doesn't change who she is, sex is just something people do. You will understand when you do it yourself :-).

When did you meet most people and put them through a lie detector test about being virgins.
But, let's say for the sake of argument, that were the case.
Just because most people do something, doesn't make it right.
People misuse the the word "normal" as a synonym for ok-to-do - this is not its meaning.

[Wakeup]

Actually, if you read the thread, you can see that as soon as the OP asked his question, she immediately started in with her talk about how a woman having sexual intercourse doesn't change anything and nobody should think it does. Like I said, her view of sexuality is completely different than the OPs and therefore, it probably doesn't present him with anything meaningful. Basically, she's just spent the entire thread trying to convince him to not care about this other girl having sex because SHE doesn't care about this other girl having sex. That's why her (and your) advice is totally irrelevant.

Their advice isn't irrelevant if it strikes a cord in the person asking for advice. If it doesn't strike any cords then it's no more irrelevant that yours or anyone else's which has been ignored.

[searock]

Actually, if you read the thread, you can see that as soon as the OP asked his question, she immediately started in with her talk about how a woman having sexual intercourse doesn't change anything and nobody should think it does. Like I said, her view of sexuality is completely different than the OPs and therefore, it probably doesn't present him with anything meaningful. Basically, she's just spent the entire thread trying to convince him to not care about this other girl having sex because SHE doesn't care about this other girl having sex. That's why her (and your) advice is totally irrelevant.

I never said that "nobody should think it does" - everyone is free to think what they want to. I'm just saying it how it is: having sex doesn't change a person. If someone is skanky, they are skanky whether they do or do not have sex. If someone is a good person, they are a good person whether they do or do not have sex. And so on.

Having sex per se hasn't changed this girl. You (somethinglol) are sad because she had sex and it wasn't with you, that's a perfectly normal feeling - I felt the same way when I was a kid and my crush had sex with another girl instead of me. I felt like I had lost a huge opportunity and that nothing would ever be the same. Looking back, I now know that his having sex didn't change anything apart from my thoughts about him. It was such a big deal to me because I was completely inexperienced and I thought having sex changed everything somehow. Then I grew up and I had sex and I understood that it really doesn't work like that. Sex can be special and amazing with the right person, or it can be just okay, it can be bad/awkward/painful/whatever. The first time holds no special meaning per se: what makes sex amazing is not the number of times you had sex before, it is a number of factors such as your level of intimacy with your sexual partner, your connection with them, your chemistry with them, how comfortable and relaxed you are with them, whether you are in love with them, etc... these are the things that matter. Not how many times you had or didn't have sex in the past.

[cbad]

Their advice isn't irrelevant if it strikes a cord in the person asking for advice. If it doesn't strike any cords then it's no more irrelevant that yours or anyone else's which has been ignored.

Sure, just ask the OP. We have two ways to approach his question.

1) Her way, which is to say that he shouldn't feel what he does because she thinks it's totally fine for anyone to have sex with anyone else and if he feels that way then he's a chauvanist.

OR

2) My way, which is to acknowledge and understand why he has those feelings of being hurt and try to address the issue from his viewpoint.

I bet you my way makes more sense.

[searock]

Sure, just ask the OP. We have two ways to approach his question.

1) Her way, which is to say that he shouldn't feel what he does because she thinks it's totally fine for anyone to have sex with anyone else and if he feels that way then he's a chauvanist.

OR

2) My way, which is to acknowledge and understand why he has those feelings of being hurt and try to address the issue from his viewpoint.

I bet you my way makes more sense.

You seem to have some kind of disability that prevents you from understanding things. I'll just repeat my previous post:

I never said that "nobody should think it does" - everyone is free to think what they want to. I'm just saying it how it is: having sex doesn't change a person. If someone is skanky, they are skanky whether they do or do not have sex. If someone is a good person, they are a good person whether they do or do not have sex. And so on.

Having sex per se hasn't changed this girl. You (somethinglol) are sad because she had sex and it wasn't with you, that's a perfectly normal feeling - I felt the same way when I was a kid and my crush had sex with another girl instead of me. I felt like I had lost a huge opportunity and that nothing would ever be the same. Looking back, I now know that his having sex didn't change anything apart from my thoughts about him. It was such a big deal to me because I was completely inexperienced and I thought having sex changed everything somehow. Then I grew up and I had sex and I understood that it really doesn't work like that. Sex can be special and amazing with the right person, or it can be just okay, it can be bad/awkward/painful/whatever. The first time holds no special meaning per se: what makes sex amazing is not the number of times you had sex before, it is a number of factors such as your level of intimacy with your sexual partner, your connection with them, your chemistry with them, how comfortable and relaxed you are with them, whether you are in love with them, etc... these are the things that matter. Not how many times you had or didn't have sex in the past.

[HeartIsAching]

Searock, you're trying to use reason. If you've read any of somethinglol's threads, he and reason don't co-exist.

[searock]

I may have, I don't remember... I guess I give up then. *sigh*

[VincenzoG91]

Sure, just ask the OP. We have two ways to approach his question.

1) Her way, which is to say that he shouldn't feel what he does because she thinks it's totally fine for anyone to have sex with anyone else and if he feels that way then he's a chauvanist.

OR

2) My way, which is to acknowledge and understand why he has those feelings of being hurt and try to address the issue from his viewpoint.

I bet you my way makes more sense.

Your way keeps the OP unhappy, because this is not an issue that can be addressed by the OP. The girl's virginity is gone, and it ain't coming back. If the OP wants to insist that it's a big freaking deal, then he gets to wallow in misery. Yay, misery! Or he can grow the hell up and get over it. So, your way doesn't make any damn sense, it just emphasizes unhappiness.

[cbad]

Your way keeps the OP unhappy, because this is not an issue that can be addressed by the OP. The girl's virginity is gone, and it ain't coming back. If the OP wants to insist that it's a big freaking deal, then he gets to wallow in misery. Yay, misery! Or he can grow the hell up and get over it. So, your way doesn't make any damn sense, it just emphasizes unhappiness.

Sure, but if you want to say that then nobody should ever have any problems. For example, if you said "my wife just cheated on me," then I could reply "the problem is you're close-minded ...have you ever considered that monogamy is unnatural? If you disagree, then I guess you'll just stay a miserable loser." See how that doesn't actually solve anything? It just forces the poster to conform to *your* particular beliefs, which apparently are that it doesn't matter. But it does to him.

[searock]

Cheating = betraying your partner's trust. It has nothing to do with being monogamous or polygamous - even polygamous people can cheat, if they go behind their partners' back.

[pcmaster]

At age 15 theres no way OP can find another girl his age also virgin. Its like most of these girls are in longterm relationships or already pregrant. Also when this girl hymen got teared up(which OP is not sure about) his heart got broken. Its like hymen had connection with his heart so bascialy other guy stabed OP heart with his dick lol. Recovery from that may take days and even weeks which is forever. Until realising that there is much better girls out there for him, OP is doomed to live a virgitirian life.

[cbad]

I wouldn't say that he can't find a girl who is a virgin at age 15. That may be overstating things. The point is, though, that I don't believe he's just running around trying to find someone who is a virgin to boink. He cared about this one girl and was just hurt that she slept with someone else. It's basically that simple, unless I'm totally misreading his posts. I don't read him as one of those guys who is like "I'm going to run around and have sex with every virgin I can so I can be her first!" (and there are guys who are into that).

[somethinglol]

Your way keeps the OP unhappy, because this is not an issue that can be addressed by the OP. The girl's virginity is gone, and it ain't coming back. If the OP wants to insist that it's a big freaking deal, then he gets to wallow in misery. Yay, misery! Or he can grow the hell up and get over it. So, your way doesn't make any damn sense, it just emphasizes unhappiness.

I pretty much agree with cbad. Of course, some of his statements I don't, but pretty much I do. And I have already got through it, so no, he does NOT make me go in misery.

[searock]

Don't worry, you have plenty of time to grow up :-).