my gf of 1.5 years doesnt invite me out with her and her friends anymore. why?

[livingthedream]

hey girls.

so... Id like to get your opinion on something.

My girlfriend of 1.5 years has over the last few months for some reason stopped inviting me out with her and her friends (which consists of both males and females, including work and private groups of friends)

Before this, she invited me out to everything, and I'd happily go along, even if I thought it was going to be a bit awkward because I didn't really know them to begin with.

I didn't notice this for the first month or so, as I could happily occupy myself with my group of friends if she didn't invite me out with her. However, now most of my friends are busy with uni or have moved away, so I have been noticing a lot more that she doesn't invite me out.

Whenever she goes out, I don't invite myself, but I kinda hint that I'd like to come, but she never really offers.

Instead, the only time we spend together is in our own private time. And in that time, she tells me and expresses to me that she loves me (and either she's a really good liar, or she actually means it - and she's a very honest person, so I don't think she's lying).

Why would this be? Is she embarrassed/ashamed of me around her friends? I honestly think I get along very well with a lot of her friends, including her female friends!

I will add, however, that she has a strange relationship with her ex (he hasn't moved on from her/they still talk - they are friends from her small country town home, so it's hard not to still be in touch with him). Also, she has admitted to me that she still has feelings for him (but assures me that not to the same extent she has for me), but that's a whole other story. And I know that she has bumped into him whilst out at a clubs around town, and each time she says she was glad I wasn't there, cos he was there and it would have been awkward if i was too.

So i dunno, maybe she is purely worried that if I'm out with her, we will bump into her ex, and it will be awkward?

I really don't know...what should i make of this?

Please help!

[smackie9]

Ususally when they start putting some distance between you it means she is crushing on someone else.....someone in her group that she goes out with...possibly a co-worker. That's just a guess tho.....you could invite yourself at the last minute and observe her and the others throughout the evening.

If you really want to know, you need to call her out on her behavior to get any real answers.

[DalM0m]

It seems suspicious but you can't jump to conclusions. You have to ask her what's going on & you have to tell her that you would like to be included. To be excluded every time is a problem; once in a while it's good for couples to do seperate things.

If the answers don't add up, you have to figure out if you two are destined for a 2 year anniversary.

[bluesummer]

The only way you'll get your answer is by straight up asking her (sorry) because there's a million possibilities to this. The first two that came to mind (most common) to me were:

A) Friends are annoyed about her always bringing boyfriend around, or just want their 'friend time' without you around. It's sort of disrespectful but I've seen it happen lots of times
B) Her friends actually don't like you OR you have embarrassed her around them in the past

Like I said, there are tons of other possibilities, I'm just throwing out the two most common that I've seen (or done!)

[smackie9]

If that's the reason then you shouldn't be dating anymore. If you can't have them be apart of your life, social life and family life then there is no point.

[Boisdevie]

Rather than asking us why not just ask her?

[AshUnlimited]

Dude here one advise for me, leave you before you get hurt,. i know that senario, be strong men . if you need help after pm me i will explain to you what happen to me

[4 ratties]

Every once in awhile, her going out with friends id understable but she should want you to come. Sounds like she may be hiding something. I would talk to her before anything happens

[mellymel]

yah maybe there is someone in the group she likes or crushes on...or maybe one of her friends doesn't like you???