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Thread: Girlfriend said she no longer has the time for me

  1. #1
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    Girlfriend said she no longer has the time for me

    So here is my story. Been with this girl for about 20 months now, people say we are the happiest couple they have ever met. We always look forward to seeing each other and love one another very much. Anyway my girlfriend is often very stressed with work and has 2 kids, so we generally only get to see one another a couple of times a week.
    About two months ago, that frequency started to drop, sometimes I was seeing her only once a week, sometimes once a fortnight. She had made comments in passing the last few weeks saying "I've hardly seen you" but as I was cool with not seeing her as often, as I knew she was busy at work, I thought she wasnt too bothered either.
    Anyway about one month ago she hardly texted me one week and I asked her if something was wrong to which she took ages to reply but basically said she was just stressed with work. I didn't buy this explanation so I asked to see her to talk to her but when she came round things were totally normal we seemed really happy. I just put it down to work stress. Last weekend we attended a wedding and both had a really good time and enjoyed each others company. However the texts almost stopped this week and we had a chat on the phone last night. She feels that she just doesn't have time for a boyfriend anymore because of work and her kids and because of this she feels our relationship hasn't progressed as she had hoped. She just feels it isn't working anymore and that we are not spending the same quality time that we used to together. She said that she just wants to be single and be with her kids, who I know are incredibly important to her, however she did say she is really going to miss me. She said that shes not happy and that she wants to end the relationship. I had no other choice but to agree.
    However a couple of hours later I decided that I wasn't going to let go of what only about two months ago was a brilliant relationship especially seen as it shouldn't be too hard to put the situation right. I texted her this and suggested we have a 2 week break without texting or phoning or anything and then get together and try and work it out. She has agreed to do this. The thing is that we are always so good together it's just that we probably both haven't been making as much effort to do things together and haven't been communicating as well as we should with our problems. Now I know people are going to think that she has met someone else but I think this is highly unlikely, she hardly has any time to go out and socialise and she works from home, she also texts people right in front of me, so I know shes not hiding anything. My question is in 2 weeks time how do I convince my girlfriend that we can make it work. We've had 18 incredible months, it's just been the last 2 that we've started to see each other infrequently. It just seems like a bit of an overreaction to want to totally end the relationship over this.

  2. #2
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    She has left the relationship. Accept it because you have no choice.

  3. #3
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    Snow, looks like your girl is flaked away from ya. Perhaps she thinks she have more potencial with other guys. That wedding might reminded her life and that shes havent married. Basicaly she could be looking for a guy with more husband potencial or already found one since she changed her behaviour and distanced. Anyway the reasons could be lack of positive emotions or she might simply want to be taken care of. You know these hard working girls likes to be pampered since they giving so much to work so they want someone take care of them instead. Perhaps these 18 months was incredible for you but not so amazing for her.

    Anyway if someone dont apreciate your presence then make them learn to apreciate your absence. Best you can do is dont contact her but just do things that makes you happy and theres a real chance that she will want to be part of your happy bubble in your reality.
    For example if two persons are having conversation and one person is facing away and dont wana talk then this person is showing higher value. But the person who is trying to talk is only lowering own value.

    This guy explains why its important not to run after girl


    Now you have time to learn be happy on your own and when its done it will be easy to make her happy. Dont act like beta guy acting like shes the only girl who could like you. Even if you lose, lose like a winner. You cant solve problem with same mindset that created it. Its importand to step back take your mind off it. And then come back without fear, with being okay problem not being solved.

    I finally learned to say
    Whatever will be will be
    I've learned to take
    The good, the bad and breathe

    Vannesa Hudgens
    Last edited by pcmaster; 05-11-13 at 06:53 AM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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    Sometimes people want a change, and feelings fade.....it happens. Being too busy is not the real excuse, she's just not that into you anymore....life will go on without her.

    Why are you two not living together? Maybe that's the problem....you are not really sharing each other's lives....you are just dating.

  5. #5
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    Thanks for the all the advice. I will not contact her for the next 2 weeks. I have thought of ways that we could make this work.
    Do you think that the fact that she has agreed to talk this through in 2 weeks time is a glimmer of hope that she wants to resolve this?

  6. #6
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    Or it could be her just saying that to pasify you...you know soften the blow for the inevitable.

  7. #7
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    I think it just shows that she can survive 2 weeks without talking with you. In your place I would let her contact me first.

    Anyway If you want her back then when time passes say something like -"My life always been like hurricane but since we are together I understood alot. I found my way and happiness. Im not worthy of you. You are worth a lot. but Im ready to change. Just give the time. Im not cool if someone looks your way. I dont want anyone else touch this pussy but me."

    And ofcourse before you speak be a little in love with yourself and realise that you look milion points of 100.
    Last edited by pcmaster; 06-11-13 at 06:45 AM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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