But we talked a lot and... well long story short, it broke me and my ex up. Then I ended up dating this new guy. However, this guy went away a little while ago. He's coming back in 20 days. Shortly after starting to see this guy, I sorted my life out and got over my miniature breakdown, and I've spent pretty much every day since shortly after starting to date this guy (every day since figuring myself out) missing my ex. Not a day goes by that I don't miss him or think about him. Not a day goes by that I don't think about how easy it would be to slip back into my life with him. And not a day goes by where I don't think... what have I done? I've been trying to give it time, to see if it was just a temporary thing. But I've been in a downward spiral.
How very unfair you are being to the asshole that helped you to emotionally unengage with your ex partner (the man you now long to be with) WTF. You string him along if you are with him but want to be with someone else.
Seriously leave both men alone for at least one year. Get the help you need (therapy) to figure out what it is you actually want out of life besides some man that you're not even sure you want to be with. Work on your maturation, your integrity, your personal boundaries. Take some courses, join a gym, read some self help books (go to the library or your book store and browse the titles that will help you to improve YOU).
You are being unfair to yourself and two men in this scenerio. You need to be alone and learn to be happy in your own skin before you'll ever be happy in a relationship. Work on you and forget men right now.
“The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion