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Thread: He'll be gone for a week...

  1. #1
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    He'll be gone for a week...

    But he also said he's turning his phone off. It kind of made me mad to begin with because this vacation was kind of a surprise for him supposedly, and we'd planned to get together the Friday he's leaving. Then he tells me he really wants to go instead. I understood a bit, but I was disappointed because I hadn't seen him for a while. So he came down to where I live the next chance he got before his vacation, and it was really nice to see him... however, right before he goes on this vacation he tells me he will have his phone but he's turning it off, so I could still text him. I wasn't too pleased. I said, I wouldn't be able to contact him? He repeated. I said, it'd be like texting a wall. He said he's taking a vacation not a phone cation. He dropped this on me right before, and he'd told me before that that we could still talk on the phone, as a way to reassure me it would be alright.

    What the ****?

    My expectations have always been to keep in contact within this relationship, it's not like I expect more than one phone call a day, or at least often enough during the week he's gone to feel connected. What is he thinking? I'm kinda hurt.

  2. #2
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    Is this long distance? If yes then my advice is to break up.
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by michelle23 View Post
    Is this long distance? If yes then my advice is to break up.
    Is there any reasoning behind that?

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    Well its hard to trust someone you only see every now and again especially when he doesnt want to talk to you for a whole week.. my guess is your much more invested in this then he is. Hes not too bothered really so why are you wasting your time on him when he cant even spare you a quick phonecall.
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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    Thanks, I needed to hear things like that.

  6. #6
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    Your welcome. Sooo what you gonna do? Its better to find yourself a local bf-one who is willing to invest his time on you and gives 50/50 instead of 80/20.. thats not a relationship. Its being taken for a ride
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

  7. #7
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    Why is he turning his phone off? That's bullshit.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by michelle23 View Post
    Your welcome. Sooo what you gonna do? Its better to find yourself a local bf-one who is willing to invest his time on you and gives 50/50 instead of 80/20.. thats not a relationship. Its being taken for a ride
    There is really no one around here worth seeing either. I think I'll just try to be happy single and make some friends, not try to find a boyfriend, and purposely avoid finding one. Though it's kind of hard to decide if I want to give up on him, just turning off his phone for a week is pretty unforgivable. I wish he hadn't decided to do that because it forces my hand, and it forces me to believe he's no good. I know my feelings for people when I have them are genuine, and I wouldn't do that to a partner. I'd make sure I was available. Not say I would be at least available by phone then turn around and just abandon them 100% during Christmas time.

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    I thought maybe someone could shine some light on the inner workings of this jerkiest of things to do. My guess? He's with someone else? I mean what else could it be.

  10. #10
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    How long have you been dating this schmuck?
    Are you exclusive? Did you have that talk?
    How often do you actually spend time with one another?
    Does he think you're casual while you think you're more then that?

    As michelle said, I think you are way more invested in him then he is in you.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    He gave the impression that he was just as invested but his actual actions don't live up to it.

  12. #12
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    How long have you been dating him?
    Do you know if he's exclusively seeing only you?
    Are you the type that will blow up his phone and that's why he isn't going to leave it on?
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  13. #13
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    I've been with him 4 months. He said we were exclusive, how to tell if we actually are? No clue, if you know that let me know. I don't usually blow up his phone if I know why he'll be busy. I've only blown up his phone a couple of times when he hadn't called me for a while and I couldn't hold off, and he wasn't responding. I don't really want to talk about it anymore, I'm already ready to put it behind me because I think he's not who he says he is. *facedesk*

  14. #14
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    Well, now he's telling you outright that he won't be phoning you so that you don't go off on him again for not answering you.

    You have only been out with him four months the honeymoon period when, if a guy is really into you, he'd not do anything that might make you give up on him. All this guy is done is do stuff that screams that you should just leave him alone. So yea.. you're making a good decision to put HIM behind you. (I hope that's what you meant by "put it behind you"

    Do NOT let him hoover you back in after Christmas like nothing happened. Lots of douche bags do crappy things before the holidays to hopefully force you to break up with them so they don't have to spend time with you or buy you anything or show you that they even care, then come back afterwards hoping that you lack the self-worth you need to stay away and just pick up where they left off... getting sex from someone they don't have to show they care about.

    If you make up your mind to leave him, then keep to your decision. Dump him before he leaves.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  15. #15
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    I know this sounds harsh but get out of fantasyland. He's not in a relationship with you nor takes it seriously
    Last edited by surfhb2; 21-12-13 at 09:37 AM.

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