Can you be just friends with someone who is hot and you are attacted to?

[warrior princes]

Hi
I became friends with this guy. But I was not attracted to him at first so I was able to be friends with him. He was the one who pursued the friendship because I certainly did not think I had any chance to be friends with someone who already had so many female friends and admirers. But I sensed he wanted more. He keeps saying he thinks I'm hot (and I know he thinks that by the way he looks at me) and wants to be better friends. But I started to be attracted to him too and realised how hot he was too. Thats when the friendship turns weird and uncomfortable. But he kept insisting to be only friends even though he said he liked me but wont ask me to be his girlfriend. He wants to build the friendship first..and wont go into a relationship with me because we dont have that strong friendship..and he doesnt want to go into one which might not work...which is ok..but how do I that?! How do I make myself be comfortable and be myself with him and just be friends and trust him and build intimacy in the friendship when we both are so physically attracted to each other?!!! At the moment we only see each other in group settings and dont really talk or flirt... There is alot of tension...I dont know how I'm supposed to act?! Do I go hold him because its what I want to do (and what he wants too) or control myself and treat him like a brother first?!! Confused!

[indigosoul]

Of course you can be just friends w/someone you are attracted to. Taking things to a physical level ALWAYS involves a conscious choice, even when ppl pretend it doesn't. You don't know how to act? Why act at all, just be yourself. This is what being a true friend is all about. You should be able to be completely comfortable w/that other person. No games, no facades. Comfort and communication are the basis of ALL good relationships, friendship and more. Your "friend" is correct. The best relationships always start as strong friendships. Relax and be yourself.

[true_love]

From a guy's perspective, its a very frustrating situation to put yourself in. I am experiencing the same frustration with a girl I just recently met. Read my previous post. One....if I pursue a friendship, that will not stop her from seeing other people because your stuck with your friends cap on. Two....if one of us is more interested in the other, then its destined to fail. I can't pick up on her signals so I'm really trying hard to figure out what I'm supposed to do. We have touched on the topic of dating but I got the impression she wasn't interested so I immediately pursued a friendship with her. I hardly ever get to talk/email her so its going to be hard to figure out where any of this may all lead. The tension is very uncomfortable. My advise......and what sounds so easy for me to say.....cause I'm in your shoes but a guy.....would be to clear up the situation by just being honest with one another. What do you really want? Friendships are not bad......they can grow from there into a relationship. If you don't pursue a friendship, how will you ever get to know this person? I would pursue the friendship and see where it all leads. The worst thing that could happen is a friend out of the deal. I don't know your situation in full detail but it can cause many sleepless nights because your in a state of uncertainty. Honesty and being open with someone really goes a long way today. Keep me posted and good luck.

[Only-virgins]

I can't find a logical reason why you can not be friends with someone attractive.

[mhussain]

yes u can be friends .... whether u remain friends or not is upto u

Hussain

[ALovelyLady86]

Am I the only one that this bothers? Whats wrong with people being friends with someone who isnt hot? Why does this girl feel the need to express that this person is hot... I'm sorry but this seems too...shallow for me to answer I think...
Seems like to me youre only interested in his...hotness lol