Solidarity does not exist in relationship world

[Kalfusadon]

Have you ever noticed how girls never do anything to for example start a conversation with person they might be intrested in? Well thats because we dont expect them to do so, and belive me you need to be neither a huge man hunk or millionare to even get eye contact from them! And i think this is wrong since this leaves people who are painfully shy like me completely helpess in overall contacting with girls! And worst thing is that this thing will never brobably fade away since girls are getting even more selfish as time goes on and that is a problem that leaves a lot of men witout girlfriend for the rest of their lifes...

[Cerby]

Sounds like you're blaming an entire gender because you lack the confidence to strike up a conversation?

[Kalfusadon]

Sounds like you're blaming an entire gender because you lack the confidence to strike up a conversation?

Its not my fault that i lack the confidence im am born as shy! And since you clearly are not, its really hard for you to know how painfully bad this condition is... Dude i can even say hi to shop assistant or order a meeting with doctor since i am so scared of people... And do you not think that its unfair that we always have to do EVERYTHING in relationships, and that leaves people like me who are uncabable in doing that comletely alone...

[Cerby]

When you identify a problem with yourself, you have two options:

1) Take steps to fix it
or
2) Blame someone else and use that as an excuse for your problems.

If the problem is you're shy, then join toastmasters or another public speaking group. Join a co-ed sports team or a club of some kind. It is easy to have self pity when you sit in your room and play world-of-warcraft all day when you could be getting out, honing your social skills and meeting women.

DO NOT transfer blame to someone else, if you suffer from social anxiety or some other personality disorder, go see a doctor and get some recommendations. Perhaps read a book called "The Four Agreements", that book will allow you to realize that the only person responsible for your happiness (or lack thereof) is you.

[Kalfusadon]

When you identify a problem with yourself, you have two options:

1) Take steps to fix it
or
2) Blame someone else and use that as an excuse for your problems.

If the problem is you're shy, then join toastmasters or another public speaking group. Join a co-ed sports team or a club of some kind. It is easy to have self pity when you sit in your room and play world-of-warcraft all day when you could be getting out, honing your social skills and meeting women.

DO NOT transfer blame to someone else, if you suffer from social anxiety or some other personality disorder, go see a doctor and get some recommendations. Perhaps read a book called "The Four Agreements", that book will allow you to realize that the only person responsible for your happiness (or lack thereof) is you.

How the hell do you expect me to go to meet people... I know i am already lost and only thing i can do is to accept it i dont and will never have any other life than sitting in my room playing wow... But its not about me its about other people who im worryed about, cause i know there are other people like me who still. Might have a change... But their change is runed by this unfair social system that bashes and throws shit directly to shy peoples fases and that is what broke me so bad that it can no longer be fixed...

[Lord Darkshire]

Gosh how would you even know that men do everything in relationships when you have never been in any to begin with. Get in a raid and chat with some chicks, or chat with some in your guild. I have gotten a few lays that way.

[Kalfusadon]

Gosh how would you even know that men do everything in relationships when you have never been in any to begin with. Get in a raid and chat with some chicks, or chat with some in your guild. I have gotten a few lays that way.

You can see it from media... Dont you see how it feeds girls with false, for example no madder if girl would look like a cow or a troll social media keeps feeding them with lies like "you deserve better" or "you are too good for him" and thats why every single girl only wants that ****ing manhunk! And my guild is filled with people like me (mostly 20-40 year old ugly/fat virgin men) that is only place where i actylally get along with people since they are like me... And even if there would be girls in my guild i would not have gourage to talk a word with them!

[michelle23]

You are not just shy. You have social anxiety-borderline agrophobia. You need help with this.

Your so shy and so quiet-you probably come across as closed-unapproachable. If you were more confident, more open then girls would talk to you. Plenty of girls make the first move. This is 2013-not 1920..

Its not true that men make all the effort. A healthy relationship is 50/50

[michelle23]

Btw only a minority believe everything they see on tv. Most of us have a mind of our own. I know plenty of guys who are not "hunky-masculine" (as you call it) who have lovely girlfriends..

[Kalfusadon]

Btw only a minority believe everything they see on tv. Most of us have a mind of our own. I know plenty of guys who are not "hunky-masculine" (as you call it) who have lovely girlfriends..

My problems cant be solved, my faith is sealed and i have accepted it. But i am worryed about other people... I have been 8 years in school with 700 students and now im in vocational college with 300 studets who are all from age range of 16-20 and i have never seen or heard any girls doing first moves and belive me in here where i live you really need to be this fashion star and pay around 10 000 euros to get this so called "moped car" if you do not have that you are a looser... End of story. I have never been fashion star or owned a moped car and there was like 10 guys who were like me and all of them ate more or less like me and all of them agree with me on this!

[Cerby]

Dude is trolling, everyone just stop responding, he isn't here for help.

[Kalfusadon]

Dude is trolling, everyone just stop responding, he isn't here for help.

I have never been trolling... Why would i even want to troll about these things im not happy to be like this but i just know there is nothing to do to help it... Im just worryed and dont want other people to end up like me! Im spreading goddamm opinions here!

[oxytocinbite]

How the hell do you expect me to go to meet people... I know i am already lost and only thing i can do is to accept it i dont and will never have any other life than sitting in my room playing wow... But its not about me its about other people who im worryed about, cause i know there are other people like me who still. Might have a change... But their change is runed by this unfair social system that bashes and throws shit directly to shy peoples fases and that is what broke me so bad that it can no longer be fixed...

I am shy person, but I don't blame people and act like my life is ruined because I am socially awkward. Yes you can change and become more outgoing, the fact that you keep telling yourself you can't is stopping you from being able to. There is no "unfair" social system, you are blaming everything because you don't have any confidence.

I was a lot worse when I was younger, I was sheltered and never really had any friends. I kept feeling sorry for myself and it did not help at all, in the end it made it worse and made me feel like I would always be extremely shy.

The world is not against "shy" people, you are just making it that way. The first step of changing is realizing you have a problem and getting some help for it, whether you take it slow and just speak to people online via voice or you just jump into the scary deep water and realize you can actually swim is up to you.

[Kalfusadon]

I am shy person, but I don't blame people and act like my life is ruined because I am socially awkward. Yes you can change and become more outgoing, the fact that you keep telling yourself you can't is stopping you from being able to. There is no "unfair" social system, you are blaming everything because you don't have any confidence.

I was a lot worse when I was younger, I was sheltered and never really had any friends. I kept feeling sorry for myself and it did not help at all, in the end it made it worse and made me feel like I would always be extremely shy.

The world is not against "shy" people, you are just making it that way. The first step of changing is realizing you have a problem and getting some help for it, whether you take it slow and just speak to people online via voice or you just jump into the scary deep water and realize you can actually swim is up to you.

Just get help? Just talk? You would not tell a person who has never driven a car "just drive" cause he would most likely crash and die. Thats the same with social interaction! There is rules to that! You cant just drive and you cant just talk and whatever nike tells you you cant just do it... And btw im not just shy... Thanks to michelle23 (from this thread) who made me relise that i have "avoidance personality disorder" you can google it if you wish... And that is much more deep and complicated than just shyness... And its way too deeply in me to never go away!

[HeartIsAching]

My problems cant be solved, my faith is sealed and i have accepted it.

Cool beans. Quit bothering us with it, then.