How to handle a physically awkward/shy woman?

[murkishslurkish]

Hey there

Around 3 weeks ago I started dating this girl. I've found her to be very interesting, funny, intellectual and beautiful
we have been on quite a few outings together, and have a lot more planned for the future. I really enjoy her company
and feel great whenever I'm around her, but one of her traits that I can't seem to get over however is her physical coldness.
Within the time that we've seen each other she has never even kissed me on the cheek and usually finds it very difficult to
hug. I'm not the kind of guy who obsesses too much over the physical, and having recently just come out of a difficult relationship,
I don't have a problem with taking it slow, but at the same time I'm wondering if she simply doesn't feel a spark.

The thing is, I'm wondering if I'm ever going to bring her out of her shell. She recently came out of a long relationship, getting
betrayed completely in the process, which she says, makes it very difficult for her to trust people.
She pays me compliments quite often, has told me that she finds me attractive and (from what I've seen) enjoys my presence, but whenever
I've tried to initiate kino, or some form of physical intimacy, it is repulsed quite quickly. The rationale part of my brain tells me that
this girl is simply a tough cookie to get to in that way, but in combination with it usually being me who plans activities and things for us to do,
I'm wondering if she may not be as sincere as she says. I mean, how often have you told someone that you like them very much in that way,
yet refuse all forms of physical affection? As an afterthought, she has told me that with her previous boyfriend it took her months to get to
the stage of physical intimacy, but at the same time, who knows if this is true?
I'm quite an affectionate person, and haven't experienced this kind of behaviour from a girl before. Not that I go for easy girls, but more in
terms of being at this point in the relationship with a girl, and nothing more than hugging happening.
Does it sound like she is simply a girl that takes a loooooooooong time to get to that point, or does it sound like I'm being played?

I really do like this girl, and for the first time in a while have found someone that I am both physically attracted to, and feel that
I just "get", if you know what I mean. In a weeks time we're going to Paris for a day trip, part of me has thought about simply
going for a kiss at the right moment, but then another part of me keep repeating what she has said to me in the past which is

"I only kiss people when I choose to kiss them"

Bit a mind-fudge atm, I may be overcomplicating it though. If it helps with your advice, I'm 23 and she is 24

Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks

[basilandthyme]

I can't tell you why she's doing what she's doing. But I can tell you that by choosing to chase her, you're making your life a whole lot more complicated than it needs to be.

Stop chasing this one and find a girl who isn't broken.

[Aldaris]

If shes interesting, funny, intellectual and beautiful bite the bullet and stick with her. Just show her genuine compassion and things will fall into place.

[Boisdevie]

If shes interesting, funny, intellectual and beautiful bite the bullet and stick with her. Just show her genuine compassion and things will fall into place.

Bullshit. Been watching too many romantic comedies recently? The woman sounds frigid. Advice? - find a woman who likes shagging. Or failing that brush up on your wanking techniques cos that's all you're going to get.

[Aldaris]

Bullshit. Been watching too many romantic comedies recently? The woman sounds frigid. Advice? - find a woman who likes shagging. Or failing that brush up on your wanking techniques cos that's all you're going to get.

You sound like a 16 year old drop out. If they have a connection it should be pursued. We don't know the girl is "broken" or just needs time to heal from her past relationship. Real love is better than a fling.

[murkishslurkish]

I like the contrast of opinions guys, thanks