@Carmine_1
"......but the lie seems to be growing......and getting worse, and really I was never concerned with this stuff in a relationship before, but now I feel lied to and deceived, and I need to know the truth.....So lets say I talk to her, she gets defensive as I would expect any women too when you go prying into her past, Whats the best outcome? Things are really good right now, and I don't see us slowing down......but this just may be too much for me to handle, I'm supposed to stand at the alter with her and NOT think about this stuff? UGH.......
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Oh and BTW, I have up rooted my life and moved my children quite a distance to be with this women, secured a new job in this area that is an absolute dream job, I mean it all came together like it was meant to be. So I followed my heart, and now I feel duped and deceived. So dumping her flat out may not be the move....and if it is it will be a very difficult one....I have to move out with my kids, find a place around here so I can keep my job.....it's pretty complicated, and again I know all that is an excuse but I hate to upset her kids and mine, and put them through a move, and loss of a parent figure AGAIN.....they have all been through so much already......UGH just want to scream...."
I can feel your fustration and betrayer. Moving with your kids to join her and getting a new job was actually enough for her to know that you do truly love, care and trust her as well. Really does not matter how long you found those things in her closet for the second time. Being that its ditsurbing and haunting you. Talk to her and see if she gets defensive, then you know what tha means...at least you should know now befor taking her to the alter. If you decided to move on without confronting her, somehow its still going to pop up in the future ahead....don't know how going to deal with it then.