girlfriend had an attitude yesterday

[markmartinisfas]

I was with my girlfriend today when she went into a building for a quick appointment. I wasn't going to go in but decided to. Well I didn't notice she left her keys in teh car and i locked the door so she was locked out of her car as was I. She said she told me to grab them but I didn't hear her.

My friend picked us up to take me to my car so I could take her to her house to get her spare keys. She was not happy. She said she was annoyed and upset and asked if i ever listen to her.

She even called me stupid.

She said even though I am 24 at times I act 18 and I have alot of growing up to do

I apologized to her and told her it was a mistake that could have happened to anybody. i told her i know i have some growing up to do but it's not like I am immature all the time. I am serious when I need to be, I just always like goofing around and having a good time.

She said she understands she was just annoyed and she knows I am working on my flaws

I was upset she took it out on me but tonight she made up for it telling me she loved me and then said, "dont worry about what happened babe, stuff happens"

I guess I just gotta work on some stuff

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Next time she says something like that, slap the shit out of her. Before she realizes what happens, pop her again with the backhand. She'll know her role from then on.

[Smila]

So what is the question here?

[Tigger1101]

Hey dude, this stuff happens in relationships sometimes. It never feels great when it’s going on but the truth is just letting the moment pass is a good way of letting her vent. Try and realise that the anger might be directed at you but it might well be because she herself is angry about not picking up the keys in the first place. Or even it’s the fact that she is stressed about something else entirely and the keys just pushed her over the edge.

I would advise that if you want to improve things look out for the warning sings, has she been saying she pissed about something, or has she eaten (A lot of anger directed towards others can be put down to three facts, 1. Lack of food 2. Lack of sleep and 3. Too hot or too cold) if you notice these things then try giving her support (Women don’t want solutions a lot of the time they want to be supported) if she’s stressed about something ask if you can help, a lot of the time the awnser is no or please do something small to help out. It’s the showing the suport that helps.
It’s important you don’t just become a push over, part of what most women love about their men is their impulsiveness and strength in a relationship (Not physical strength, but being able to keep it together when shit goes down). What i mean by not being a push over is if you can see the problem for example if she’s complained about being hungry and she’s instead started getting anger towards you because she got too mush to do, don’t respond by being aggressive back! Firmly state that she’s hungry (As you might be too) and point out that you going to get some food. She might protest but don’t let that stop you! Get the food and give it to her. After she’s eaten she will be calmer and probably have a more balanced view.

Sorry dude i ranted a bit there, hope it helps you out

[TheEvilJester]

I'm not sure why you are posting here. Just to blow off some steam? Fact of the matter is, she was out of line to treat you so poorly for an innocent mistake. I'm sure the vast majority of us have accidentally locked the keys in our car at some point in our lives. These days, a lot of cars have features that won't allow you to do so. Isn't technology great? ....You know... sometimes. LOL! Anyway, anybody who has NEVER done this.... I guarantee you they have done enough of their own really stupid things in life by mistake. We all have.

So, she was out of line treating you like that..... However, we also all fly off the handle from time to time and act in ways that do not make us proud of ourselves. Show me a person who can say they have never unfairly lost their temper on someone and I will show you a huge liar (hint, they'd be the same person). As long as this is not something she does all the time, I wouldn't sweat it. However, if it is very common from her, then I'd consider telling her to learn some respect or you are going to end the relationship. My ex was like that all the time. Mind you, I never put up with it for a moment, but that does not make it any less unacceptable. One of the many reasons I should have left that loser loooooooong before I finally did.

[basilandthyme]

Show me a person who can say they have never unfairly lost their temper on someone and I will show you a huge liar (hint, they'd be the same person).

For what it's worth, my hubby has never lost his temper at me (in 20 years). Neither fairly or unfairly. Not even when I got the holiday dates confused and our family missed the international flight and we had to buy new plane tickets for 4. I'm not quite as good - I ranted at him once when he drove drunk.

Mark, I guess you will have to figure out if this type of behaviour is a deal breaker for you. My first consideration is how often this type of behaviour happens. If it's twice a year, you'd probably be best to live with it. If it's weekly, she needs to understand that it's unacceptable to you

Lastly, an apology doesn't cut it unless it's matched by a change in her behaviour. I just hate when people apologise and then repeat the mistake...to me, it voids the previous apology.

[MrLoyal]

My gf drove my car into a wall and I was less upset with her. Was it that time of the month? Tell her to relax a little.

[searock]

Was it that time of the month?

Oh jeezus

[surfhb2]

You may need to work on things but the next time she insults you make sure you tell her to hush up....its ironic she was the one telling you to grow up

Also, get a hide-a-key. Its a no brainer purchase

[TheEvilJester]

For what it's worth, my hubby has never lost his temper at me (in 20 years). Neither fairly or unfairly. Not even when I got the holiday dates confused and our family missed the international flight and we had to buy new plane tickets for 4. I'm not quite as good - I ranted at him once when he drove drunk.

If that is true, then that is great! :-) However, I am sure that, at some point in his life, he has probably unfairly lost his temper on somebody, even if it wasn't you. Everybody has done something like that at some point in their life. We are all only human. Well... most of us anyway. Still not really sure how human I am...