It happen....

[Idainaru]

Hi people...!!!

I wasnt here some time, struggling with my life an my relationship...but at the end....exactly today we broke up....via cell phone conversation.

Last 2 months (since she is away again), we kinda worked on fixing relationship. But it was an illusion, because only what i was getting from here were copy/paste good morning and good night messages. Few conversations from time to time...I was treated like crap, she hang alot with their coworkers...leaving me in worry and fear for her.

She became very active on her FB profile, posting many pics about his new friend and collegue. She told me they are just friends, she likes to annoy him by taking pics of him...its like some their internal joking.

This guy ended his job there and accidentally i met him today in gym and introduced myself to him. It was few words conversation.

Told my gf later about it...and she got upset. Like will i now search for all her friends around and meet them??? It looks stupid and everything...
Then i got pissed, asking whats the big deal. Do you have anything with him? No, she swears she doesnt...

Somehow we got to the point of argue that nothing changed. She still doesnt know should we be together or not. She cant and wont live a lie..

I asked her when will we see each other now, she doesnt know. In april she will come home. She could come in march for a few days but she doesnt want to, and it costs alot..no matter the fact she has spared money and i offered to split the cost.

I asked her, would you come if i ask you to come, just because of me? "I dont know, maybe..".

Ok, thats enough, i wont be treaten like crap anymore. I told her perhaps its the best to end this..."If you want it so" she told me.

She also told me that she wants to be in relationship where she can call me or see me when and if she wants, and not when we "need"!!! Well, i am not object. I have feellings and needs.

At the very end i told her i wont contact you anymore..you contact me if and when you have need. And we will see what will happen.

Also, one thing i promissed to her. If i find out that she cheated on me, someone will get hurt! I will act like idiot and i cant guarantee what will happen. Again this upset her. "People talk about me...they will tell you something wrong and you will do some shit..", well, what can i say.

I must say that she sent me flowers on valentines day, with card "to show you that i think about you".

I need advices for further days. I will probably see her friend a lot more in gym. How to act? What to do if she doesnt contact me soon? And how to act if she does? Besides obvious problem (she doent love as boyfriend anymore) does it smell like she has something with this guy?

[basilandthyme]

The only people who know for sure what's going on with this guy are her and him. That being said, if you're unhappy in your relationship and doesn't care for your needs, you have done the right thing by breaking up.

The only thing which concerns me is where you said someone would get hurt if you find out she cheated on you. Mate, do you know how childish this makes you look? Perhaps you are only 19....but it's time to grow up. Threatening violence makes you look like like a meat-head. Carrying out violence would show that you are a meat-head with no self control. And if the person you assault has any sense, they'll press charges on you.

[Idainaru]

No, i wasnt threating her or him, like ill punch them or anything. I have said that i will drink and be reckless and i cant guarantee what will i do. I was being impulsive when saying that, i explained her that i dont intend to fight with anyone.

[basilandthyme]

You still have to account for your actions even when drunk. "I was drunk, I didn't know what I was doing" doesn't cut it for me.

Either way, if she was no longer in love with you, you've done the right thing by ending it.

[Idainaru]

Well...she told me she loves me and cares about me, but not as a boyfriend part. She knows that she used to ador me, and she could feel the same if we work on it. But she doesnt know does she wants this anymore. Classic story...

[Sunnybeach7]

She doesn't own you.. you have a right to talk to who you want, when you want.. heck.. even make friends with him if you want.. she doesn't have a right to tell you not to.

And seeing you when and if she wants just doesn't cut it. She does not want a bf/gf relationship with you.. because if she did, she would have to consider your feelings too.

Yes, you are not an "object" to be played with and put away when she's done with you.