SOS......ladies what can I do.......long read

[hard2figure]

Hello, I'm 51 and can't seem to keep my 54 year old girlfriend happy. I will give a little history first. We have been going together for 20 months now. We met on match.com. We had great chemistry and still do but stress and some health issues from our lives is causing us to argue. I have been married once previously for 18 years and back then when we argued we forgave each other and moved on. We grew apart and split when my kids were 9 and 12. They are 17 and 20 now and the 16 year old lives with her Mom and my son is at a University. After that I had one other LTR, after being with her for 3 years it didn't work out, she was 50 and irresponsible, she was always jealous, had a dead beat 35 year old son living with us and very demanding of my time. I couldn't get away from her, anyway I had to end it. I stayed single for less than a year and decided to date again.

I really missed the companionship and family life. The woman I am with now is very independant and a giving person. I have really fallen deeply in Love with her, but she has such a demanding work schedule and child care (grand daughter care) schedule she is always super stressed out. I have brought it to her attention, about the childcare load her 30 year old daughter has put on her. Her daughter is single and has a very demanding job as well working from 6:00am to 7:30pm several days a week rotating schedule. My lady has to get up at 4:30 am some days and go to daughter's house so the daughter can go to work, then she sleeps a little and then takes her grand daughter to school or another relative for keeping during the day. Then my Lady goes to work 8-5:30 with no real break for lunch and goes and picks up grand daughter again and brings her home until daughter can pick her up between 8 and 9:30pm. I have grown to really love her daughter and grand daughter as well. I have helped out at both their homes repairing things, pressure washing, cutting grass, fixing mowers, putting up and buying Christmas trees, picking up and putting together Christmas presents, etc the list is too long to write here. At the same time the daughter has some livestock at my GFs house that I pickup feed for and help out with a couple times a week. Just so my lovely GF can have a break. My GF just accepts all this load that is on her due to the unconditional love she has for her girls. When ever I suggest to get more help or hire a babysitter she gets really angry at me and says there is no one and it's none of my business. We don't live together and we have our own homes but I do spend a few nights a week there. I bring food, cook and do what ever else I can to help out and I do love helping them all but I just think the stress from it all is hurting the woman I love and making her extremely exhausted. I have taken them all out for dinner and taken my GF away for short vacations to show her I love her and let her destress. I even got her a massage. I don't know what else I can do and now she wants to break up with me because when we argue she gets even more stressed out and if I'm out of the picture she has one less stress to deal with. She always would tell me she loved me and I would tell her the same all the time as well. She is very stubborn and strong willed from being without a husband for most of her years. Maybe some people cannot deal with having a man in thier life. I really wanted this relationship to workout.

[smackie9]

It takes two to repair a relationship. If she isn't willing to work on the issues with you, then there is nothing you can do but be unhappy or just walk away.