Would you want to know?

[searock]

I also agree that the relationship must have problems and that most people would realize it without needing someone else to tell them, however it's one thing to have suspicions and be unhappy in the relationship and it's quite another to have someone confirm those suspicions. Also, there are many people that prefer to live in denial rather than face their problems, and having someone downright tell them the truth about what's going on might help them accept it.

I for one would definitely want to know - even though I know that if my boyfriend were up to something, I would be the first to know without needing someone else to tell me. But I'd definitely want to be told anyway.

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As for her motives, I don't think it actually matters. Who cares if she only wants to tell her to get back to him? His girlfriend still deserves to know, IMO. Even if she's too "dumb" to see it already.

FWIW, I don't think OP wants to tell her with bad intentions, I believe that she genuinely just wants to warn her about the turd her boyfriend is. Not that it matters anyway.

[michelle23]

Sometimes you could be the last to know though and it doesnt mean your stupid. Sometimes you can be too close to a person and easily manipulated. Every situation is different. I mean if you trust someone then you have no reason to snoop on them or question them if there home late occasionally etc.. some people dont feel guilt so there behaviour doesnt change. Its a lot easier to catch someone having an affair then it is someone using prostitutes or occasional casual sex coz they can do that on there lunch break.. some people are very sneaky. You should always keep your eyes open just encase no matter how much you trust someone. People change