Anniversary of making love for the first time today..

[arjunck]

We made love for the first time today two years ago.. She had lost her virginity to me on this day.. She broke up with me citing reasons such as this relationship would not work and would never end in a marriage.. The reasons seem solid and I did not protest the break up.. She said she wanted to be friends and I accepted.. But to be friendzoned two years into the relationship I think is not fair to me.. I don't want to be her friend and have avoided all contact since the day before yesterday.. Today being the anniversary of making love for the first time, well this is effectively our anniversary as it was the first time I told her I love her, should I contact her?? Is it a great idea?? It is not like I want her back in my life.. But I do miss her as the break up is really fresh.. Should I contact her?? Please reply..

[searock]

Creepy... do not contact her.

[basilandthyme]

noooooooo. Do not do this.

[michelle23]

No your doing really well. Its great that you refuse to be put in the friend pile and you have more self respect than to be demoted to that but it IS over so start accepting it. Your in denial and clinging on-looking for any reason to hear her voice.

The craving for her will pass. You just got to give it some time. So stay no contact and dont humiliate yourself by begging or pleading. Let her go

[Wakeup]

We made love for the first time today two years ago.. She had lost her virginity to me on this day.. She broke up with me citing reasons such as this relationship would not work and would never end in a marriage.. The reasons seem solid and I did not protest the break up.. She said she wanted to be friends and I accepted.. But to be friendzoned two years into the relationship I think is not fair to me.. I don't want to be her friend and have avoided all contact since the day before yesterday.. Today being the anniversary of making love for the first time, well this is effectively our anniversary as it was the first time I told her I love her, should I contact her?? Is it a great idea?? It is not like I want her back in my life.. But I do miss her as the break up is really fresh.. Should I contact her?? Please reply..

... No!! ...

[arjunck]

In the three days of break up, she has contacted me thrice.. Twice via sms and once via voice call.. I have managed to not reply shaking to her texts.. I have coolly replied that I was busy and will not be able to entertain her till Monday.. After the break up I asked her for only one simple thing that she should not publicize it on Facebook or whatsapp.. Her whatsapp status yesterday was "I am doing this for your own good ".. I frankly found it very patronizing and egotistic so I am angry.. The anger is directed towards not calling her.. But I dont know when this anger could change into sadness and make me call her.. Holding on to every little bit of strength I have to not call her!!

[michelle23]

This could be her way of testing you-hoping you will "fight for her" which is total BS and quite frankly abusive, manipulative and dramatic. You shouldnt have to "fight" to keep her. Strong couples work through things together-not push you away and expect you to be able to read her mind.

If she texts you again-just say "unless you want to get back together-there is nothing to talk about so please respect my wishes and dont contact me until you have made up your mind coz I am not playing this game. Its all or nothing and I would never mess with your feelings so dont mess with mine"

And leave it at that. The ball is in her court then.

I know this is really hard but dont cave in. You may get one or two twilight fans telling you to spill your guts to her like some hollywood romance and everything will be fine but it doesnt work that way. If you give her the control here-she will drag this out forever and mess you up. Dont act as if she has all the time in the world and youll sit and wait.

Give it a month max and if shes not crawling back by then-you HAVE to take control of the situation as much as it hurts and end it. Dont be a doormat for her. Show her you are a self respecting man who knows what your worth and you know you can do better than this. Find your inner strenght, confidence and self esteem and hold onto it.

You dont deserve to be treated this way so dont play her game

[arjunck]

She has ended it.. She was firm about the decision to end it.. She also said that she needs yo figure out her career plans before she dates again.. I believe that she would not date again for a while.. I am sure the break up was not because of another guy either.. Which is why I did not want to create such a hue and cry.. But, I cannot remain friends with a girl that I loved.. It is not possible.. But the high that I get from hearing her voice is just so beautiful.. I know I should not use the word high, but she is an intoxicating woman.. Either way, I will stick to my no contact policy for at least a month.. I will probably not contact her until I can platonically say hi.. But that does not seem imminent.. So probably will not contact her at all.. Thanks for your support people.. I really needed to hear voices of reason and I did..

[michelle23]

Sorry I must have gotten you mixed up with another post. In that case stay no contact. Never be her friend. You both need closure and to move on. Your doing well so stay strong. Best of luck

[arjunck]

Both are the same posts.. Thanks..

[smackie9]

There are 1 billion people in your country....I'm sure you will have no problem finding someone else.

[Wakeup]

Who the hell keeps track of the anniversary that they first shagged? Something overly obsessive about that, to me.

[searock]

Who the hell keeps track of the anniversary that they first shagged? Something overly obsessive about that, to me.

It's also creepy as hell - "she lost her virginity this day last year", eww!