Hi, guys. I haven't been around lately, because unfortunately life has been hectic, but I hope I can figure out my time and find a way to spend more time here trying to help people and get some help myself.
I am in a long distance relationship for almost a year now and I have really strong feelings for my boyfriend. However, I have been noticing some issues for a long time now. There are a lot of little things that annoy me about him. If he's into jokes of a comedian that I find stupid and childish, I judge my BF for liking his jokes. If he does silly things, I judge him and find him childish. And because we are in a long distance relationship I have absolutely no idea how he behaves with his friends, but from the things he has told me, I immediately imagine he turns into a 13 year old who only talks about boobs and women and sex. And this just leaves me feeling really insecure. I have talked about this with my BF but he only says he knows what he's doing and that he doesn't feel like there's anything wrong in what he does and that he won't change who he is because of me or because of the high expectations I have of him. The thing is that I'm not the typical girl and I really don't want him to be the typical guy who only talks about girls and sex whenever he is with his peers. I want him to be different, just like I am. And a part of me feels like I don't want to have to deal with these little things about him that annoy me to no end.
However, I also think this is an issue that comes from within and from my lack of experience (he is my first BF) and self-confidence. My BF is a lot more social than I am and I feel insecure about this. Because if I truly trusted him and if I were truly comfortable with who I am I would be able to just ignore these little things and focus on the things I love about him, right? At least that's what he does. He doesn't care if I talk about guys with my friends or whatever. And he says I shouldn't worry with the way he is with his friends, but only with who he is to me. But I just can't see things that way and I can't stop judging him for these things. It also doesn't help that I don't know any of his friends and have absolutely no idea how he is with them (but I still can't help but imagine he's the typical guy and judge him for it). Has anyone been through something similar? Because I fear I will never accept him the way he is. I really don't want him to be a pig with his friends even if he's the sweetest guy when he is with me. Thanks