+ Follow This Topic
Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 83

Thread: When Should A Couple Have Sex First?????????

  1. #1
    snckrs's Avatar
    snckrs Guest

    When Should A Couple Have Sex First?????????

    I believe this Thread has been needed for quite some time. Alot of the questions people ask often involve sex. Most of the time the couple has sex to early in their relationship or brings sex into their friendships, and things get awkward. Feelings get confused, people distance themselves, people get clingly, and normally the relationship ends.

    This brings me to my question. When should a couple have sex for the first time? First date to soon? Third date to late? Wate till marriage? Should women insist on waiting 90 days before giving out the cookie as Steve Harvey suggests. How long should a couple wait and why do you think that?

    SNCKRS!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    7,055
    Hubby and I spent almost all night fvcking on the night of the day we met. I was getting ready to do the 'walk of shame' the next morning...when he woke, kissed me good morning and we started again. That was in 1992 and we're still very happy together.

    I think there is no "should" about it. Each person should do whatever works for them.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,622
    The rule is that there is no rule. I've shagged on the first date, I've shagged on the 3rd or 4th date. Whatever works. I personally prefer to shag asap but I"m a randy old pervert.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Spain
    Posts
    1,012
    I think it's nice to recognize the attraction and let the feelings build up too and feel in love :-) None of my ex-boyfriends would have had any problems becoming intimate on the first dates but none has ever rushed me and they liked the thought of waiting until we fell in love and it was worth it :-)
    Last edited by Valixy; 18-05-14 at 09:45 PM.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    19
    I personally was raised pretty damn oldfashioned so my answer will probably be different from most on here. I have previously been in a relationship where it took 10 months for us to sleep together and even then it seemed too soon. Other relationships i have had only a few months and that was definately too soon for me. And thats just a personal thing for me have slept with 2 people in my life and take it very seriously (and tbh if i could take back both of those i probably would and i want the least regrets i can). I want to love the person so much, i want to think they are going to be my happily ever after. I used to belive in the fairytale, now im a cynic who will die alone.

  6. #6
    snckrs's Avatar
    snckrs Guest
    I would have to say Im Old Fashioned with new age old fashioned. I would advise couples to wait till marrige. But that seems like asking for a miricale now. So I would say to wait 90 days. I jumped into the physical relation with my ex way to soon.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Sydney
    Posts
    7,055
    the term "Old Fashioned" makes me laugh when it comes to sex and relationships. One of my grandmothers had a shotgun wedding in the 1920's.....and I got to read my other grandmother's 1938 diary from before she married my grandfather
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Surrey, BC
    Posts
    15,542
    Ya people f ucked on first dates since the beginning of time, and hardly anyone ever waited til marriage. The majority married because they were pregnant lol.

    I agree there are no rules. It all depends on the individual.

    I think I may have waited a couple of weeks with my husband but it was because of opportunity (we both were living at home at the time), we have been together for over 24 years now.

    - - - Updated - - -

    btw I have never waited 3 month before having sex...ppffft no f uckin way would I wait that long. In fact it would be a deal breaker.....I'd tell him bbbubbbye!

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by snckrs View Post
    I jumped into the physical relation with my ex way to soon.
    Sorry to break the news to ya, having sex too soon wasn't why your relationship failed. And that goes for you too fumble.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    19
    I never claimed that it was the cause of the end of the relationship, neither did snkre. It made no difference to the dynamic of the relationship just i and my partner both agree that it would have been nicer if we had waited longer because of the people we are. Like you said it depends on the individual

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Surrey, BC
    Posts
    15,542
    Quote Originally Posted by fumble View Post
    I never claimed that it was the cause of the end of the relationship, neither did snkre. It made no difference to the dynamic of the relationship just i and my partner both agree that it would have been nicer if we had waited longer because of the people we are. Like you said it depends on the individual
    Well why make such a statement ("and tbh if i could take back both of those i probably would and i want the least regrets i can".) if it wasn't an issue?

    - - - Updated - - -

    btw withholding sex before marriage will not guarantee you commitment or happily ever after, nor does it prevent infidelity. So what is there to gain?

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    543
    I agree with ^^^. Before you buy a car, you need to take it for a test drive!!! If not, how would you know it's the right car for you ;-)

  12. #12
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    19
    Having sex wasnt what caused the end of the relationship but i am a believer of the sanctity of sex and therefore regret that i have slept with these men who are no longer a part of my life, i was raised in a one life one man way and i wanted to stick with it. I slept with these men for the wrong reasons and thats why i regret it. (And because of personal abuse i feel differently about sex than most people) Im sure that witholding sex isnt a way of gaining anything in the relationship just with the history i have had and the upbringing combined, sleeping with someone is very complicated. What is to gain is that is feeling comfortable in a relationship, some people want to have sex straight away and thats fine for them, while others dont. Not sleeping with someone is no game to try and get a happy ending but sleeping with someone because its the 'done thing' thesedays definately wont put me in a situation where i feel comfortable.

    Also i didnt test drive my car before i brought it

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    543
    Quote Originally Posted by fumble View Post

    Also i didnt test drive my car before i brought it
    I hope you didn't get a lemon :-(

  14. #14
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    19
    Quote Originally Posted by chinagirl View Post
    I hope you didn't get a lemon :-(
    Nah its a lovely car, considering i brought it on friday 13th without having even looked at it for once luck was on my side

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    543
    Quote Originally Posted by fumble View Post
    Nah its a lovely car, considering i brought it on friday 13th without having even looked at it for once luck was on my side
    Good for you!

Page 1 of 6 123 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Looking like a Couple
    By Imsomeones in forum Love Advice forum
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 23-04-08, 08:40 AM
  2. Shy couple (need help!)
    By wishiwassocial in forum Love Advice forum
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 15-05-05, 08:42 AM
  3. Here's A Couple, Let Me Know What You Think
    By Katalyst315 in forum Love Poems
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 11-04-05, 01:29 PM
  4. Odd Couple
    By Justinfirelake in forum Love Advice forum
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 30-08-02, 06:06 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •