I'm guilty of being a selfish jerk

[burningquestion]

My gf of about a year has been dealing with her exes spouses recent suicide. Shes close to the family and has been helping them sort things out so I was kinda left totally understandably to the side. In a week we barely communicated by text message. So last night, stupidly I went by her home late, after a night out, unannounced because I needed to see her and to just know how she was holding up, I know it was a bad move. We kind of exchanged not so nice words and I acted like a complete childish ass, we did hug goodbye and I have since apologized about not putting her needs before my own and for acting like such a selfish ass. I just feel awful and since we were in not such a solid place before hand I fear this thing she's dealing with and my dumb antics have ruined what I thought to be a wonderful thing. Thanks for any candid input

[pcmaster]

Well if shes griefing about her ex then shes not completely over him. I mean its not fair to you to be in relationship when you still care about ex so much. No matter hes dead withdrawing is not a solution. If you together then you should be together in bad times too. I think it is perfectly okay from you to visit. Even more because you cared about her and wanted to see her. Exchanging bad words wasn't good however. Dont think you ruined anything. She probably forgot about it and losing ex made her understand that life is short and bet she learned better appreciate people in her life. If she loved you she still loves you.