Need advice ; havent spoken or slept in same bed for over three days

[Mewmew]

Hello,

Me and my fiance have been together for almost 4 years. We have made no plans to marry so far, it usually has to come from me when we talk about it and I feel like I am pushing it on him.

Anyway. A couple of days ago he got very upset after playing an online game with one of the people. We were playing together, and as he become more annoyed (with me), I told him we were done playing. (I remained positive throughout the entire game, but his mood was just low) I said that I rather not play with someone who is mean, and threathens to go afk the minute things go wrong.

Then I asked him if there was anything else, I was expecting an apology as it wasnt my fault that another person had upset him, over a game, mind you. Then he was like ; when you are done, you are done. And then he went offline on skype. We live together but sometimes we use skype to communicate when playing games. So I didnt say anything for a couple of hours. Then I asked if we were going to bed on skype, or if he needed more time to sulk (as it was a video game that people frequently are being rude in, theres the option to mute too, so didnt think its something to stew over for that long) so then he said nothing and went offline or blocked me.

Since I feel like it isnt my fault that he got so annoyed over a videogame, what someone said, I kept trying to lift his spirits throughout, but all I got was like well, whatever I am going afk. (Which I think is rude to me as we are playing together and you cant just leave)

That night I slept on the couch. We havent talked for since wednesday evening (so not three days, I cant edit title.) now and I have slept on the couch every single night. He has only said 'hey' to me, then when I asked him what is going on, he didnt respond and just walked away. It looks like I am sleeping on the couch tonight again too.

He has also just played behind his computer this whole time which makes me feel that I dont matter aslong as there is internet connection.

What do I do?

[KingZ]

It takes two to remain in this awkward silence. By not approaching him, you're equally responsible.

You can either wait for him to break the silence, or you can be the bigger person and make it right. I recommend just starting a conversation at this point; it's been 3 days and you're both behaving like children.

[basilandthyme]

Kingz is right about one of you needing to break the silence. And it can be you.

I also want to add that the language you've used with him would be exacerbating the situation. And what is wrong with him wanting to leave the game if the game isn't working for him? Do you really have nothing else to do but play on the computer?

Sounds to me like you pushed him into continuing when he wasn't enjoying it and then got pissed because you pushed him too far and he got really mad. Yes, perhaps he could have used better behaviour in the game, but it would have been far more productive to say "I think you're right about stepping afk - let's do something else" But no, you chose to push him to continue the game and then blame him and label his behaviour when it all went downhill.

Then asking him if he was going to bed or needed more time to sulk just made it worse. Why not just say "hey, would you like to come to bed now?"

I think you're equally to blame. Yes, he may have been in a bad mood on the game, but you wanting him to continue playing despite him wanting to walk away...and then being verbally rude to him was out of line.

Start by apologising for your own behaviour and see how things go.

[michelle23]

The fact that you are sleeping on the couch for 3days over a silly little argument is a red flag to me. How is your relationship in general? Would you describe it as good? Do you spend quality time together? Do you fight like this often?? And both of your communication skills seriously need work. What about affection? Do you cuddle, flirt with each other? etc