Communication hit all time low - Should I leave him alone or what?

[sunnyrain]

Needing a male's perspective please!

I’ll try to make this as short and to the point. I became friends with a guy about 11 years ago. We were just friends, and then it developed into that FWB thing. We eventually lost communication due to different circle of friends, work, and moving – just general ‘life’ stuff. After a few years passed, we hooked up again. Unbenounced to me, the guy had a GF at the time. I finally found out and confronted him, and he said it was an open relationship so it was “OK.” I was alright with it after mulling it over in my head, as I do not have any kids, no BF and a steady job, so …. If it’s OK with his GF, then alright. Of course, as you can imagine, BAD CHOICE on my part. I began to have stronger feelings for him and that just messed things up for me as he did not have the same for me. I was basically his ‘last-call’ when no other girl in his black book was available. Suffice to say, I cut it off and deleted from my life all contact as I thought it would be best to move on. I was sad and hurt and went through the usual blue period but since have gotten over it and started dating and socializing.

Well, a couple years pass and I hear from him out of the blue. His father had just passed away and he lost his job then moved to the other side of the US. He would call and text me and we would skype a lot. He was depressed, sad, etc. I helped him through his dark period of his life and even helped his mom with funeral stuff. He would ‘indulge’ me with sexting quite often and we’d always start and end the day/evening with a good morning and good night text. Well, he recently has found himself a new GF and again, says it’s an open relationship. But of course living 2000 miles away, there’s no physical contact with him. But when I went on vacation, he’d sext me but would tell me if I want to send pics to email them because he ‘just wanted better quality photos and not the crappy phone pics’ I never sent any photos. It just didn’t feel right. Even when I went out of state for holiday and mentioned it to him, he immediately said he’d come visit “that is, if you want to see me (wink wink)”  that’s what he said but never did hear any more about it.

He used to tell me all about his day at work, what he had done during the evening, such as his hiking or biking expeditions he went on with a meet up group or send me links to his photos he’d take. But again, this has all stopped. I rarely hear from him. And I DO understand when we get our GF’s and BF’s that it can be time consuming, so to speak, but he was always the one to say, “if I get a GF I will never cut you out of my life, we are friends forever.”

So, I am kind of hurt by his behavior-if nothing else, I miss our talks, just the friendship in general (nothing sexual). I mean how can we go from texting and calling one week and the next, I hear nothing from him?

Is this normal? Should I say something about it to him or leave it alone and let him just go on his way and not respond to any text I receive from him? I am in the 'dating pool' and I have friends (gals from work and such) that I hang out with, usual stuff...so it's not like I am just sitting in my room waiting for a text or call from him, but I do admit, at times I kinda miss not hearing from him....sounds dumb, I know

I am a bit confused.
Thanks in advance for any suggestion!

[sarahliscious]

This guy is using you, plain and simple. He talks to you when he needs someone, he ****s you when he's horny cause he knows you'll be there for him no matter what. Mom's dead, oh, I've got the right person. Penis is hungry for some pussy? There she is again. Cut off all ties, make him realize what he's missing out on, and let him know how unfair he's been treating you. Just say 'what happened to not cutting me off even if you got a gf?, Some friend you are!'

Treat him the same way. He starts talking to you again? Tell him you have a boyfriend and it's serious, he might rethink things and realized that he's lost you for good.

[lost_man]

The reason you keep doing this is because you gain a sense of self esteem from looking after him and/or from the attention. Sometimes in life there are people who tend to give and others who tend to take. Because you have given a lot you don't want to feel that it was all for nothing so you perpetuate the relationship but on some level you know that it not healthy. You need to stop it because he will casually bleed you dry. Move on.