He likes me but why isn't he asking me out?

[aphroditescupid]

I have been flirting with a guy in one of my classes; we've been attending the same university throughout this year. It started with just smiles and winks and polite hellos. It took about a month just to have small talk and call each other by our names. When summer classes started, we had designated seats that are quite near each other. We always greet each other and have small talk here and there with other classmates around. I know he is interested, but he has yet to make a major move to ask me out.

He always seems busy going on to his next classes or job and is surrounded by his "bros." When he's not, he is pretty quiet. He always emphasizes to his bros and our classmates that he he does not have a girlfriend and he always does this within earshot so that I can hear. Also, when he is setting up plans with his friends, he always says (within earshot as well) "Can I invite a girl?" and then says that he doesn't know any girls.

He has finally begun to ask me a few personal questions about my family, where I live, etc. but he has yet to make deeper conversations or any major moves. When we are in flirting mode he starts these convos, but when I am concentrated in my work or do not show up to class one day, then he doesn't really talk that much to me for the next two or three days.


Even though he is very sociable, I feel that he may be a little shy with me. I'm not very talkative either, though it is mostly my subtle flirting efforts that has made us become this far even. Most of the time I am mostly focused on my work. Now that we are sitting near each other, I actually find it more difficult to continue my flirting for some reason. Before, it was easier for me to just pass by and poke him or just wink and smile.

I would really appreciate it if he can step up the game and make a move.
I know he is definitely interested but what is holding him back?
Is it because he is always surrounded by his mates?
Does he think that I may not be as interested?

It is really frustrating to have things hanging in the air.

What can I do to spark his interest even more to move this forward without me having to ask him out directly and looking overwhelmingly desperate? Constant flirtation would be very inappropriate in our classroom situation. What is a more natural way I can approach him?
If I was able to ask him out directly, I obviously wouldn't have written this post.

fyi: he is a lot older than I am. I'm 24 and he is 32, returned from the army.

[nico88]

I'm not trying to rain on your parade or anything but just from what you mentioned it doesn't sound like he's really interested in you. I'm not saying 100% that he isn't but if a guy is interested in a girl you usually know it by his actions. And since he hasn't really made any moves or tried to have more than just small talk conversations with you then I'm kinda thinking that he's just being friendly than flirty. Unless you know.. he's shy or socially awkward but since you said he's very social then I don't see that as being the problem.

If you wanna get to know him more and see if maybe there really is something there than ask him for drinks after class sometime and see where that goes..