Should I be bothered by my boyfriends facebook contacts?

[laurenm88]

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 months and I'm really bothered by the fact that he has girls he spoke to on Plenty Of Fish on his facebook friends list. He told me when he met me he closed down all the dating profiles, but the girls from these sites are still on his facebook. I do trust my boyfriend, but it bothers me, why does he need them on there? They are not friends.

I was in a 6 year relationship before him when my ex was very untrustworthy and always did things behind my back so I know I've got trust issues.

Should I just accept that he loves me and not these girls and try to live with it, or should I ask him to remove them from his facebook for my own piece of mind.

I really don't want to be controlling over him and certainly don't want to project hurts my ex caused on to him, but I feel a jealous fury at the thought of them being there. He has plenty of female friends, that's not the point, I'm not so insecure as to try and control him like that, but these girls are from Plenty of Fish a dating website.

Please help me, is this okay or am I right to be annoyed by it?

xxx

[surfhb]

Yes it's fine....you're being silly.

FB destroys relationships over crap like this.

[laurenm88]

Why naive? What is your opinion of this situation?

[laurenm88]

He doesn't talk to them anymore, they are simply just there. I don't know why it's bothering me so much, I just hate the fact that these women are from dating websites, he was obviously attracted to them. I just feel that if he is serious about his relationship with me, he'd have the decency to remove these women. Is that unreasonable or should I just learn to accept that just because they are there doesn't mean anything, doesn't affect our relationship.

[toknow]

It's not unreasonable at all.

[laurenm88]

Thank you.

[michelle23]

Have you told him how you feel?

[blackmoon]

A lot of people have a ton of "friends" on their FB that they don't even talk to, I think after awhile it just becomes whatever. Don't worry about it.

[TheEvilJester]

First off, I just want to say that I think it is goofy that this is even a thing in this day and age. That Facebook matters to relationships these days. Sheesh! LOL!

However, I personally think this one is pretty simple. Boils down to two simple things.

A) Why would you let this bother you? Who cares? These days, people tend to have tons of "friends" on their Facebook, and the vast majority of them are people they don't even know and never even talk to at all, even on Facebook itself. It's just as possible he sort of just forgot they were there amongst his Facebook friends. If he doesn't talk to them anymore, then who cares? You won anyway. They didn't. You got him, they missed out.

B) If he doesn't even talk to them anymore, then I don't see why he can't just remove them. So, if it really bothers you, just tell him and politely ask if he wouldn't mind removing them. Don't make a big deal out of it, because it really shouldn't be a big deal one way or the other. No reason he can't just remove them, yet at the same time, no reason it should bother you, really.

Also, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying you are WRONG for letting it bother you. You can't help your feelings. Plus, you mentioned that you've had boyfriends in the past prove untrustworthy, so it is understandable why you are a little guarded. I'm just saying, don't let one a-hole from your past ruin your future. Don't sweat the small things in life. Either way, good luck! :-)