Hi all,
My girlfriend (21) and I (25) have been dating for about 6 months. We hit off immediately once we met, and it's been amazing for the most part ever since. My only real issue with everything is how 'forgetful' she is. She says she's forgetful but I'm not sure I buy it. So here's a few things that have gotten on my nerves, and I guess what I'm wondering is if it's valid for me to feel upset about them.
We live about 30 mins away from each other and I'm the only one who drives between the two of us. So if she's coming over to my place, I have to drive there to pick her up and drive back here. Not something I enjoy doing in a half ton truck. If we're going anywhere, I have to drive. Now if she had no way to get a car, I could understand that I'm going to be the one driving, I get that. But here's what bothers me - Her father has two cars and only needs one, so he lends his second one out to friends and family as needed. He basically gave her that car. It's been sitting in her parking spot for 3 months and hasn't moved. Granted it is a manual and she doesn't know how to drive it (I don't either, I have to admit), but her father and friends do. So she could learn. She hasn't even bothered to get her licence! I've told her on many occasions that me driving every day is starting to get tiresome. I spent $600 in gas one month, and I told her that. Still to this day she doesn't have her licence.
I like to talk and converse a lot in a relationship. I really believe communication is key before everything else. Sometimes she stays at work for a couple days in a row, because there is access to a guest lodge and where she doesn't drive, if she doesnt get driven out there and back she will stay the night there. I've asked her on multiple occasions to text me periodically throughout the day or evening just to check in let me know you're having a good day, etc. She's over an hour away staying somewhere by herself, is it that strange for her boyfriend to want her to say hi every few hours? I've asked her this numerous times. I've told her that it matters to me that she stays in contact and doesn't go the whole day without saying a word to me. Yet she still does it. Literally, what I am asking for is "Hey babe, its a really busy day here but I'll give you a shout later, hope you're having a great day, I love you". That's IT. And I rarely ever get that.
And finally, general forgetfulness. I've told her my middle name, to which she's forgotten a couple different times if I asked her. I've told her my birthday, and its on my FB, and she's forgotten it when asked. She also said the wrong day in front of friends, which was embarrassing. I'm scared to ask her what she thinks our anniversary is.
With this all said, I don't exactly feel like much of a priority right now. She has access to a car and could help out with me spending a ridiculous amount on gas every month, yet she chooses not to. She could send me ONE text a day that would satisfy me, yet she doesn't do it. And she could take some time and try to remember important dates in our relationship, yet she doesn't do it.
Am I justified when feeling upset about this? I hate to nit pick and be that person thats always pissed at something, but this is so silly to me. These things are so small and yet they're causing such tension.
I will say of course, this doesn't paint the whole picture of our relationship. She's an amazing girl who I love so much, and we do have a great relationship. Like I said, these are small things but they really do bother me. What do you guys think?