Okay, I really need some help or advice, because I can't take it anymore, and I don't know where else to turn. The only type of men I attract into my life are lying assholes who are just desperate and looking to use me in some way. I don't know WHY I only attract these types of guys, when literally all the girls around me are always attracting great guys, being treated amazingly and falling in love! And honestly, I barely attract guys into my life in general.. I am for the most part.. Alone. But when once in a blue moon I do get a guy, of course he is a jerk/player/asshole. I feel like I am so unworthy of love but I really want it, but I feel that I am starting to become desperate because I always attract the opposite of what any girl would want!
An example of how I am treated is so recently there was this guy who admitted to me that he was interested in me for quite some time, but I had no idea because I thought he liked another girl, but then he told me he actually didn't like that girl and liked me the whole time. Stupid me believed him and we started talking even though I was cautious and didn't like him at first, and over time I started to fall for him. Eventually I found out that the whole time he actually DID have feelings for the other girl, so he was talking to both of us at the same time, even though he said that he only had interest in me, and now he isn't contacting me at all and I don't know why.
I just don't know what it takes to get an honest, genuine, good guy that tells the truth and truly likes me for me! I also found out that this guy always goes from girl to girl, and so I am just another random girl that he was testing out.
The guy before him that I dated was even worse. He acted super nice and sweet when we were first dating, but once he realized he had me he turned into this distant asshole that only would express interest in me when we were having sex.
The guy before HIM acted like he was really into me, but then I found out he was talking to another girl and he ended up leaving me for her because he was crazy about her and I guess she was a lot better then me in some way.
Guys I like NEVER stay interested in me for long, and they always leave me or treat me like crap the first chance I get.
I just feel so alone and hopeless. I already have low self esteem which idk maybe that is what is causing all of this, but now I feel like I literally have no self esteem at all because this cycle always repeats itself over and over and over again. I don't really know what I am doing wrong... Do I come off as too clingy or needy or something?.. Because I really don't know how that could be.. I am pretty independent overall.. I just want to know what it is like to have true love, or even just be with a guy who is genuinely interested in me and be treated with respect!! Do guys see my insecurities? Am I not pretty or is my personality not good enough?
I just need help or advice, because I don't know what to do and I can't go through another process like this again.. I am about to give up on the idea of love... What am i doing wrong? How can i change my terrible empty love life?