What to do now having been cheated on?

[bcgirl]

Facebook is the number one way ppl can cheat easier at this day and age but also it's the number one way to catch a cheater as well. Damn social media! Anyways, I can tell u that your gf has a very high chance of cheating again. Sure she may miss u and feel guilty after the fact... But once she gets comfortable with u again, she may retreat back to her old ways. If u keep on forgiving her and taking her back, she will just know you r a pushover. Yes u want security and to eventually grow old and have a family but u will one day thank god u found out before doing something stupid like marry her and have kids. U have invested lots of time on this relationship and memories but u can have all that with someone else u will b able to trust!

[BackUpOrGetStng]

You are being sucked back in. Ignore all contact, or continue your deserved misery.

[bcgirl]

The absolutely no contact rule is key for moving on. The more she has contact with u with txting, phone calls, talking...before u know it, u r having sex again and bam...back into her arms u will go...same old bs

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Yeah bcgirl, normally I would say just use her for sex, but its clear that this mook can't handle that emotionally.

[barry1980]

Okay - Here is a MAJOR UPDATE and I guess people arent THAT interested as I did not fully take their advice but having sort of let her back into my life, I suspect her of CHEATING STILL!

Basically (and I write this just to get it off my chest really, not that I think anyone will be bothered!), she has a new flat above her workplace, and I was round there today and in the bin I found an empty box of condoms , cigarettes and a pizza bag with that blokes address on it! The one who apparently thinks he is in a relationship with her!!!!

Well, MAN I WAS SHAKING WHEN I FOUND THEM...we had been out shopping together all day! I ASKED her" Are u still seeing X" She said no.....I questioned why the bathroom smelled of cigarette smoke! Then I just showed her what I had - condom packet, ciggie box and pizza bag. She came up with some excuse about them being left by one of her work friends when she had a group over. And you know what - I said OKAY SHOW ME SOME TEXTS FROM HIM IF IT IS ALL INNOCENT. She said she couldnt believe her own bf didnt trust her! So I asked her again. I said YOU DONT LOVE ME DO U! She said JUST GO. So I went. I could see her peering from the upstairs window. SO I sped like a lunatic out of the car park just to show my annoyance.

She text me five mins later and asked WHATS WRONG WITH U XX.

My next move was not to reply but to block her number. Block her on Whatsapp too!

Hmmmmmm.......what next is anyone's guess.

If anyone DOES want to say something that would be GREAT!!!! As I am a bit of a mixed emotional being at the moment! Not sure whethere to laugh or cry!!!

[smackie9]

Dude this girl is a serial cheater, even before FB. Here's a tip....as soon as you see a change in behavior, something doesn't add up, or there is extra attention on FB, she hides her phone, messages are deleted, or you hear "oh he is just a friend" run away as fast as you can.

Remember this post? Please read it again, maybe you will listen this time.

[Wakeup]

Okay - Here is a MAJOR UPDATE and I guess people arent THAT interested as I did not fully take their advice but having sort of let her back into my life, I suspect her of CHEATING STILL!

Basically (and I write this just to get it off my chest really, not that I think anyone will be bothered!), she has a new flat above her workplace, and I was round there today and in the bin I found an empty box of condoms , cigarettes and a pizza bag with that blokes address on it! The one who apparently thinks he is in a relationship with her!!!!

Well, MAN I WAS SHAKING WHEN I FOUND THEM...we had been out shopping together all day! I ASKED her" Are u still seeing X" She said no.....I questioned why the bathroom smelled of cigarette smoke! Then I just showed her what I had - condom packet, ciggie box and pizza bag. She came up with some excuse about them being left by one of her work friends when she had a group over. And you know what - I said OKAY SHOW ME SOME TEXTS FROM HIM IF IT IS ALL INNOCENT. She said she couldnt believe her own bf didnt trust her! So I asked her again. I said YOU DONT LOVE ME DO U! She said JUST GO. So I went. I could see her peering from the upstairs window. SO I sped like a lunatic out of the car park just to show my annoyance.

She text me five mins later and asked WHATS WRONG WITH U XX.

My next move was not to reply but to block her number. Block her on Whatsapp too!

Hmmmmmm.......what next is anyone's guess.

If anyone DOES want to say something that would be GREAT!!!! As I am a bit of a mixed emotional being at the moment! Not sure whethere to laugh or cry!!!

Barry, my man... go get yourself councelling so that you can get over your addiction to this woman. She sounds possitively Boarderline Personality Disordered or sex addicted even. Google it and see if any of the symptoms resonate. Then google codependency and read about what ails you.

SO I sped like a lunatic out of the car park just to show my annoyance.

Oh you rebel you. O.o

[Cerby]

Hmmmmmm.......what next is anyone's guess.

No man, most people wouldn't be talking to her anymore, but you seem to be ok with what she is doing. You know its wrong, but she cries a bit and then you somehow convince yourself it is all better now.

I say this not to be mean, but to be truthful, you're foolish and kind of stupid. Sometimes love just isn't enough.

[barry1980]

I know I've been stupid beyond belief. all in th hope that seven+ years wouldnt have been wasted! But man this is the first time I have ever blocked her. And in a strange way I feel a bit free from the mess. Although how I will feel tomorrow I dont know.

I had invited her to a ceremony on Monday where I am getting an award for work related stuff! She was looking for a dress etc for that and I think she was looking forward to it! Obviously I think now thats out the window......what do I tell people at work though as to why I came alone!! They are expecting my gf to be there! OH WELL. WORSE THINGS HAPPEN AT SEA as they say!

[Wakeup]

Tell them you dumped the C.

I bet she shows up all dressed to the nine's like nothings wrong because she expects you to come running back to her as usual. You teach people how to treat you, Barry and read back your own words to see how you've taught her to treat you. Make it clear to her that you do not want her there. She has no boundaries.

[barry1980]

She doesnt know the location of the event so there is no way she will turn up. Its grotty thinking of her having sex with another man but I guess no one owns anyone else and that sex is just an act - but urghhhhhhh! He put his todger in her andt hat is hard to get my head around - what is it about the human mind that hates that eh!?!??:

Thanks again for your responses!!!!

[HeartIsAching]

She text me five mins later and asked WHATS WRONG WITH U XX.

Awesome. Blaming the victim. Guess what sort of behavior that is?

Hmmmmmm.......what next is anyone's guess.

Seriously? Your dick is not the magic wand that's going to stop a cheater from cheating. Get past that notion - it's time to walk the **** away for good.

Tell them you dumped the C.

I bet she shows up all dressed to the nine's like nothings wrong because she expects you to come running back to her as usual. You teach people how to treat you, Barry and read back your own words to see how you've taught her to treat you. Make it clear to her that you do not want her there. She has no boundaries.

This right here. I'd put money on her dressing and acting like it's all fine. She thinks she can violate your boundaries all she wants, and still get what she wants from you - as Wakeup said, you've taught her that.

[Wakeup]

She doesnt know the location of the event so there is no way she will turn up. Its grotty thinking of her having sex with another man but I guess no one owns anyone else and that sex is just an act - but urghhhhhhh! He put his todger in her andt hat is hard to get my head around - what is it about the human mind that hates that eh!?!??:

Thanks again for your responses!!!!

Pardon me for saying but you're missing the big picture and if you don't clue into it, you'll likely pick yet another digusting twat as a partner. The fact that she disrespects you is what should make you run for the hills. You promised monogamy to one another she's promised it more than once and she's a lying, cheating, skanky twat. Someone putting their todger in her and you being "unable" to get your head around that is your ego speaking and nothing else. Look at the big picture and what a fking mess of a partner she is in general ... that along with the extra-curricular todger(s) should make you want to distance yourself from the hot mess that is her

[bcgirl]

Barry, what the hell are you doing with this serial cheater given all the evidence and facts of her cheating. You keep taking her back and expecting things to be different. Shame on her she fooled you once, Shame on you she fooled you twice. I used to be a serial cheater with my ex. All the things shes done for example not adding you to her facebook, not allowing you to see her phone when u demand, constant lying etc. These are just the things you do know and just tge tip of the iceberg, imagine the things you dont know! my ex only found out about 2 ppl i cheated on him with and thats because i told him. the other dozen have slipped under the radar. Although you want to believe so bad that all the "excuses" and lies she says are true, you damn well know its a lie. Empty condom box in her flat? C'mon, if that is not evidence enough... I dunno what is! It's as though she is being sloppy and not covering up her tracks very well because she knows you'll always take her back. Also don't fall for the crying, the blaming things on you and making it seem like your the bad guy trick and the whole "I can't live without you" bs.... If you go back with her than don't expect a faithful spouse

[smackie9]

What an idiot.....