Quote Originally Posted by misombra View Post
you have no right to confront her. you were in a casual relationship. if you didn't want her to have sex with other people, then you should've said so.

but she's with you, and that other guy was a one night stand. casual weekend relationships>>>>>one night stand.

also, no one guy is good enough for a girl. that's why i propose we have harems.

I agree with you. (Well except for the last bit, which I hope is a joke.) I shouldn't bother her with my problem, I should deal with it myself.

I think it mostly has to do with one's ability to obsess over something. if it is one of your personality traits then it is better to find a new hobby that you would be concentrating on. I wouldn't give up on a relationship though, it might take longer than most people to get over it. most probably you will not forget it completely but you will reach a comfortable level that would not affect your relationship with others.

I do have some tendency for obsession, that's true. But it's not the first time that I'm with someone and previously I didn't have any excess jealousy or other obsessive behaviour... it really is related to the issues described here. I'm just not sure if I can live with them, although I've been trying.


Don't bring in past woes.
The past is the past... let it stay there. If you dwell on past occurrences, you'll never find a solution for the future your partner will feel less loved and respected, and you will always feel negatively towards your partner. People make mistakes. Give your partner the chance to recover from them, and encourage and support them when they make the right choices.

Thanks, wise words. Haven't managed to live by them so far though.

An added complication to the situation is that certain decisions will have to made soon, as she's being sent to a different city by her employer. If we want to continue together, one of us should really quit his/her current job and find a new one. This is not exactly helping.