A confusing "long distance relationship"

[whms694]

i think that he likes you but hes just confused as to what he wants

[StellarGirl]

Pay attention to what he's saying to you, but even more so watch his actions.

See, this is what got me messed up in the first place. He can say the "I'm gonna marry you" & "commitment-phobe" stuff, but the actions seem really different. Since we started talking a couple of months ago we've only not talked maybe 3-4 times because of stuff we had to do or it was really late at night. Usually he calls me before I get the chance to call him. Even if he's out with friends he'll answer or call me. We take turns calling/texting each other during the day. He calls to check on me when he knows I'm sick or something is going on. As well as seeming genuinely upset when our plans to see each other get broken. Etc, etc.

Now, I'm obviously not an expert or else I wouldn't be posting here. But I've seen girlfriends get used as "fun time/no commitment girls" by guys they've been with as well as had it happen to me once when I was about 16. And none of those guys ever made as much "effort" as this one. I could be wrong on this too, but it was just a thought.

EDIT: Plus he had changed his status on myspace to "in a relationship".

[Tedel]

I think he might be serious... repeat: might. The problem is that he could be scared to death of having a stable relationship. Have you talked about his previous relationships? Maybe you will find something odd over there.

Perhaps he's just being realistic about it. Living three states away, you wouldn't be able to have a short distance relationship unless one of you moves. I think he can't or he's not willing to move nor to ask you to move either. It can be a sort "She's nice, but it can't be now" feeling.

Try to talk it over.

[DharmicLove]

How does someone in the Army have seven hours a night to be on the phone? Or is he "home" meaning he's done with the Army?

Anyway, that's not the important part. The part I'm concerned about is that he seems to have at least two personalities going. How does a commitmentphobe make statements about marriage?

My gut instinct is to tell you to run.

Girl, i agree. You dont have time for that heartache, Im sure you want someone to step up to the plate NOW.