Molested?

[KelE]

This thread is really disturbing, because it seems like someone is "crying rape", which although is not as bad as "rape", It is still a terrible thing. Because it is worded that you were sleeping and he tried to have anal and then he tried to enter another way etc. I don't understand how you were sleeping if you knew he was doing these acts on you. Maybe it is just confusing, because you said that several people were laying around together and it seems like if you had awoke to someone trying to penetrate you from behind, you could have jumped up and ended the situation. Not to mention all the foreplay that happened earlier, even though that does not mean he has the right to do anything not consensual to you later, but it almost seems like it was a continuance of earlier since you were still laying together and maybe he didn't think you were sleeping. Nevertheless, you should change your habits about laying around with the opposite sex in this type of setting. It's always good to protect yourself and know where you are laying down to sleep or pass out at get-togethers or parties. This is why we have our own rooms with locks, hopefully with locks on the doors. Cause when you are asleep you can not watch your back.

[Superfantastich]

You are not a little boy and he was your best friend, taking advantage of you whilst you were asleep was totally wrong but seriously, grow up. It's up to you if you want to tell your partner, it's your conscience but If I were you I would cut contact with this "friend"

[MerryH]

Like I said, it depends. Just because a guy is giving you a bit of a naughty massage and you briefly rub his crotch doesn't mean you consent in any way to him trying to **** you later while you sleep.

FOR REALS?! lol Im sorry but if a woman grabs my crotch its on!! This is how women get "raped'

You're dumb.

Wow! Impressive retort!

No, that retort was right on the money. You are dumb. Very dumb.

You say this is how women get "raped"? With "rape" in quotes, as if "rape" doesn't exist? Because it's not "rape" if a girl touches your wiener first? "if a woman grabs my crotch its on!!" Way to have a rapist mentality. Good job, surfhb.

Please never let a woman near your junk.

[Glea]

I don't know if it's about my understanding of English actually not being that good or because you expressed confusedly but your tale is a bit obscure...
Especially the part when you all went to sleep and what follows with this guy. Were you sleeping all alone in your own room and he came in? Or were you all sleeping in the same room?
You said "you got up". I guess you meant you woke up, like you opened your eyes and realized he was rubbing your body and stuff?

You may get other sensible replies (I mean, from persons who won't call you a slut and tell you deserve what happened) but you should first get the story clear to us so we can try and help you.

[Glea]

Tsss, i like it when people ask for advices, you take a bit of your time to reply and help and they never come back.

[surfhb]

No, that retort was right on the money. You are dumb. Very dumb.

You say this is how women get "raped"? With "rape" in quotes, as if "rape" doesn't exist? Because it's not "rape" if a girl touches your wiener first? "if a woman grabs my crotch its on!!" Way to have a rapist mentality. Good job, surfhb.

Please never let a woman near your junk.

Relax and try not to think too much! Im obviously not promoting rape...if a women says No...its means no! However, you if go back to a Man's room and grab his crotch, you can bet its on (ie: we will try and have sex with you). You can say NO but half the men in this world would probably not care what you have to say at this point. So, if you are "raped" at this point in the game, its half your fault for putting yourself in this position.

Lets go over this again....if you follow a man to his room and you grab an his crotch and say No to sex at that point, you are a complete game playing Bitch!!! Period!

Every man has one of these stories in their lives and I dont expect you to understand since you are not one.

[MerryH]

So, if you are "raped" at this point in the game, its half your fault for putting yourself in this position.

Rape is never half the fault of the victim. The entirety of fault lies with the rapist. Just about everything you said in the above post is wrong, except for "No means no." But you have to understand that anyone can say no at any time during sexual interaction and it still means no.

Your attitude is ignorant and damaging. Please educate yourself.

Edited to be nicer because I don't want you to think I'm just being mean to you. I'd really love it if you could try to understand what I'm telling you.

[surfhb]

Yes....No means No! Like I said....so why am I ignorant again?


So You basically you think its perfect acceptable to go to a Man's place, grab his private parts then say "No...Im not having sex with you" ? Yes...you have every right to do and say that. You also have every right for the man to respect your decision but do you honestly think that is responsible and morally right? Do you think your decisions would be considered respectable? Id really love it if you understand what Im telling you

I love how men and women look at this at completely different angles

[MerryH]

Listen, if you want answers to those questions, why don't you do a little bit of looking into it? Try here: [url=http://www.rainn.org/get-information/types-of-sexual-assault/was-it-rape]Was I Raped? | RAINN | Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network[/url]

I love how men and women look at this at completely different angles

I don't think you'll have many men agreeing with the things you said in your previous few posts ("FOR REALS?! lol Im sorry but if a woman grabs my crotch its on!! This is how women get "raped'..."You can say NO but half the men in this world would probably not care what you have to say at this point.") Those are pretty nasty things to say and I really can't picture too many people (even men!) agreeing with that.

[devonbrown]

surfhb - You are on your own with this one. Please don't speak for all men. Most men have a little more respect for women than you apparently do. And definitely check out the RAINN website like MerryH suggested. Educate yourself.

[surfhb]

Ok....so I guess Im the only man who thinks a girl grabbing my crotch means "lets have sex"? Thats what I meant by "its on" Not..."its OK to rape you" No means No, But to many men in the world, just the fact she is in your room grabbing your dick is enough and it wont matter what a girl says at that point. This is how so many women are "raped" in this world we live in....make sense now? She should have never put herself in that position if she wasnt willing to go all the way. If you dont want to have sex with a guy, dont grab his dick How is this so hard to understand?

Reading comprehension is a lost art I guess

[VincenzoG91]

Ok....so I guess Im the only man who thinks a girl grabbing my crotch means "lets have sex"? Thats what I meant by "its on" Not..."its OK to rape you" No means No, But to many men in the world, just the fact she is in your room grabbing your dick is enough and it wont matter what a girl says at that point. This is how so many women are "raped" in this world we live in....make sense now? She should have never put herself in that position if she wasnt willing to go all the way. If you dont want to have sex with a guy, dont grab his dick How is this so hard to understand?

Reading comprehension is a lost art I guess

You're the one with the poor reading comprehension. Here is an exact quote from the OP:

"He did end up going in my pants to massage my ass. And at one point put my hand on his dick. I had some whisky, wine and vodka before, so I was a bit tipsy, flirtatious and horny... So I did touch him down there for like a few seconds before I was like "it's kinda wrong, can't do that shit". "

Let me translate it for you. He took her hand and put it on his dick. After a few seconds, she pulled her hand away. She didn't grab his dick, he forced her to touch it.

[vashti]

Actually, the way I am seeing it, it isn't clear if the guy grabbed her hand and put it on her penis, or if she did it on her own.

"And at one point put my hand on his dick."

Could be read as "at one point, *I* put my hand on his dick" or "at one point *he* put my hand on his dick".

It doesn't matter to me though. Either way, she was foolish to think this guy wouldn't try to have sex.

[MerryH]

surfhb, I'm just about done arguing with you about this, but I wanted to add that when you say things like, "She should have never put herself in that position if she wasnt willing to go all the way. If you dont want to have sex with a guy, dont grab his dick", you ARE essentially saying "its OK to rape you"

You're putting the blame on the rape victim by insinuating that she was asking for it and therefore deserves to be raped.

[qwertz]

Ok, for starters I dont think this woman/girl was "molested". She has a bf and went too far and now feels guilty, BUT her grabbing or having her hand put on his dick is not a free pass for sex...yeh it hints that way and for sure if i grabbed a guys dick it would be cause i want more to happen, that said, i could be in full foreplay and then if for some reason the word "no" then passed my lips then i would expect him to stop and go no further, but those words have to actually pass a womans lips for a man to understand. They are not mind readers.

Also, I would not be happy with anyone but my bf (ie. person in a relationship with) touching me or waking me up in the manner described (if in fact she was asleep as that is unclear).