Sick of the whole "numbers game"

[Doc Durian]

did it come with a warranty?

[NeoSeminole]

Doc Durian says:

"Don't be a child, Neo. I've never followed you around, never made advances at you, and never understood why you're so prone towards dispensing out bad advice as some sort of gospel."

don't be a fag, Doc. I don't mind when people disagree with me provided they give a reason why. So let's hear why my suggestion that the OP work to make himself more desirable is "bad advice."

[NeoSeminole]

Raze says:

"How exactly would they know that his success rate is 1/30? We have no idea what he looks like or how he really acts around women. We have no idea what kinds of women he goes for. He could be going for supermodels for all we know.

we don't need to know what the OP looks like or what kind of women he goes for. Clearly he is not desirable enough to his target love interests. He needs to be more realistic.

"No one truly follows their instincts anyway."

so you would date a girl you weren't attracted to?

"Women have different ideas about what's desirable. I personally think he's doing fine. He's obviously having some success. I still think 1/30 is good. It sounds about average to me."

1/30 is actually quite bad. Rather than praise him for mediocrity, why not encourage him to do better?

[Doc Durian]

Doc Durian says:

"Don't be a child, Neo. I've never followed you around, never made advances at you, and never understood why you're so prone towards dispensing out bad advice as some sort of gospel."

don't be a fag, Doc. I don't mind when people disagree with me provided they give a reason why. So let's hear why my suggestion that the OP work to make himself more desirable is "bad advice."

There is no need for potty mouth, Neo.

To answer your question, your advice was more suited for a wolf pack than a man looking to meet a compatible woman for a relationship.

The fellow obviously has some desirable attributes as he is getting close to some of the women, though not the right one yet.

You told him to change himself. Why should he? He is who he is. The right lady accepts him for who he is.

You're young still. With time you'll realize that it's not about the salad dressing but what's in the salad.

that's life, bro. Women are more picky b/c instincts tell her to choose the most desirable mate. Ultimately it comes down to they're the ones who bear the responsibility of pregnancy and raising the child (nowadays this role is shared). So they can't afford to say "yes" to every guy.

think about it. Why would a woman want you if your success rate is 1/30? If other women won't take you, then why should she? Rather than b*tch about it online, try to improve yourself and become more desirable.

[Raze]

I have to agree with Doc. He really shouldn't have to change himself. It's bad to lose your identity.

It's funny that you mention wolves, because they actually kill the wolves that don't fit in with the pack.

I would also recommend lowering your standards a bit. You seem alright to me. Your head is screwed on right and everything, so lower your standards and keep trying.

[NeoSeminole]

Doc Durian says:

"There is no need for potty mouth, Neo."

but it feels so good!!!



"To answer your question, your advice was more suited for a wolf pack than a man looking to meet a compatible woman for a relationship."

haha, riiiight. I'm telling him to be more realistic about the type of girls he goes for yet, according to you, it's not suited for a guy looking to meet a compatible woman. Now I know why you don't like to give reasons why you disagree. lol

"You told him to change himself. Why should he? He is who he is. The right lady accepts him for who he is."

let me guess. As a kid, you were always picked last in gym class and never won any kind of scholastic achievement award?

[NeoSeminole]

Raze says:

"I have to agree with Doc. He really shouldn't have to change himself. It's bad to lose your identity."

show me where I told the OP to change himself.

[Raze]

I thought by making himself more desirable you meant changing himself. I'm sorry, Neo, I still love you. =P

[NeoSeminole]

Raze says:

"I thought by making himself more desirable you meant changing himself."

I said he should improve himself thus making himself more desirable to women.

[carl1222]

Let me try to un-hijack this thread from the neo-doc show.

Girls don't have it easier ... they usually are looking for more from guys than just getting laid, and have to deal with trying to weed the rare good ones from the abundance of numbers players.

If you play the numbers game just to get laid, it works fairly well ... especially online. But if you play the numbers game hoping to find a quality girlfriend, it's like bringing a football to a basketball court ... wrong game.

So when people tell you that when you stop trying so hard, good things happen, listen to them grasshopper. The shotgun approach sends two unattractive messages to most girls: (1) "I'm desparately horny," and (2) "YOUR vagina will do just fine."

When you meet a girl you find attractive, drop your silly pick up lines and have a conversation with her. Talk about things in common, things that are important to her, things that are important to you (other than your d**k). If you hit it off, and she finds you attractive, then and only then will things start to happen.

Good luck.

Carl.

[Doc Durian]

Raze says:

"I thought by making himself more desirable you meant changing himself."

I said he should improve himself thus making himself more desirable to women.

Who's to say that he needs to improve himself in order to find the right woman?

Maybe they need to improve themselves to recognize him as a good man/partner prospect.

Let's not quibble over words. You proposed alteration of this man, pure and simple.

If this man isn't able to find a compatible woman because he's lacking in something obvious, alteration could be a possibility. If he's not lacking, alteration would be unjust to that person. As it stands, that's not the subject matter though. It's about the numbers game and not wanting to play it. You jumped to negative conclusions about him automatically and to defend the numbers game by way of telling him to buy into it more.

Wrong is wrong. Bad advice is bad advice.

[misombra]

Let me try to un-hijack this thread from the neo-doc show.

Girls don't have it easier ... they usually are looking for more from guys than just getting laid, and have to deal with trying to weed the rare good ones from the abundance of numbers players.

If you play the numbers game just to get laid, it works fairly well ... especially online. But if you play the numbers game hoping to find a quality girlfriend, it's like bringing a football to a basketball court ... wrong game.

So when people tell you that when you stop trying so hard, good things happen, listen to them grasshopper. The shotgun approach sends two unattractive messages to most girls: (1) "I'm desparately horny," and (2) "YOUR vagina will do just fine."

When you meet a girl you find attractive, drop your silly pick up lines and have a conversation with her. Talk about things in common, things that are important to her, things that are important to you (other than your d**k). If you hit it off, and she finds you attractive, then and only then will things start to happen.

Good luck.

Carl.

carl!!! where u been?

[Mish]

For women, the "numbers game" is sitting around, getting approached by tonnes of tonnes of guys and weeding-out the ones who "aren't tall enough" or "aren't cool enough" or "aren't enough of a challenge."

But for us guys, the "numbers game" is having to approach and ask out tonnes and tonnes of women and hoping just 1 of them says yes and sticks around.

I used to think this way as well bro until I met loads and loads of women who told me of their perspective on this. You know, we (the guys) are lucky that we get to approach all these different women being encouraged by our peers and culture, without fear of being stalked, dominated or abused, without buying the most beautiful stylish clothing and make up just to be fashionable enough to be approached. You say they just sit around and sift through the ones who approach them, but do they ever get a choice to approach someone they really like? Think about it. You are a woman and you see a guy you like, how do you get him? It's easy for a guy, he just approaches the girl he likes, chats and either gets shot down or goes out with her. But what about the girl, how does she get the guy in the opposite corner of the bar that she really wants? It's a lot more difficult for them. You say that you've gone through 30 girls in 2 months and only found one that would like to stay. I've known incredibly attractive women who went for years without landing any one. Ask yourself is that really fair?

In that time, I probably had to approach and try to talk to nearly 30 women.

Once you get better with the whole approach / interaction / intuition you won't need to approach 30 women to get 8 dates, though you will never have 100% chance of pick up, even if you are Brad Pitt. There is a reason for that, all people are different, there are only a few people in this world that you are really compatible with. It's better that things don't work out in the dating / getting to know stages than later on.

[Mish]

When you meet a girl you find attractive, drop your silly pick up lines and have a conversation with her. Talk about things in common, things that are important to her, things that are important to you (other than your d**k). If you hit it off, and she finds you attractive, then and only then will things start to happen.

I agree^

Good to see you again Carl. What happened to you? You disappeared

[NeoSeminole]

Doc Durian says:

"Who's to say that he needs to improve himself in order to find the right woman?"

don't ask retarded questions. Clearly the women he pursues don't find him desirable. So either he needs to lower his standards or improve himself in order to become more successful with women.

"Maybe they need to improve themselves to recognize him as a good man/partner prospect."

haha, good luck to anyone who listens to this shitty advice. F*ck self-improvement. Let's blame everyone for not recognizing us rather than work on improving our shortcomings! <rolls eyes>

"Let's not quibble over words. You proposed alteration of this man, pure and simple."

don't be such a drama queen. The "alteration" I suggested is no different than going to school to become more educated or working out more frequently to improve your appearance. You act like I'm suggesting the OP change his hair color and wear flamboyant clothes.

"If this man isn't able to find a compatible woman because he's lacking in something obvious, alteration could be a possibility. If he's not lacking, alteration would be unjust to that person."

when is self-improvement ever unjust to that person? Bettering ourselves opens new doors in life which bring more opportunities.

"As it stands, that's not the subject matter though. It's about the numbers game and not wanting to play it. You jumped to negative conclusions about him automatically and to defend the numbers game by way of telling him to buy into it more."

wtf are you smoking, brah? I explained to the OP the logic behind the numbers game. He came across with a hint of entitlement like women should just like him for approaching them. I was helping him see why women are picky so he can use this knowledge to his advantage.