How active are you in your home life? Meaning how often do you cook dinner, or clean up the house, do the dishes, or take the kids off her hands for a few hours, if not a whole day? Sounds like she might be missing HER time. If setting goals for herself is what might help her gain some self-confidence, then she needs support from the other side in order to make that time. If she spends each and every day with the kids and catering to them, she is going to forget that she needs to be cared for as well, whether it is by her, or you. She can't possibly tend to her own needs efficiently if she's putting her kids first all the time. HERE is where you come in.
You don't even have to explicitly state that you're giving her time to do her own thing. You could take the kids out for the day sometime and just tell her to relax. Maybe book a spa day for her, or better yet drop the kids off with the grandparents (if that's possible) and GIVE her a spa day yourself. Does she ever talk about missing any of her friends or family members? Or a hobby that she let fall by the wayside?