what talents do girls like in a guy?

[jane]

Here's a thought,

How about being yourself? Ever thought a woman may actually like you for who you are?

hhhhhmmmm... imagine that?

[MVPlaya]

Originally posted by BuzzLiteBeer
My Philosophy on Love: "You cannot find love, love finds you"

BuzzLiteBeer, I just read your signature (skipped it first time around), and I have to say, that is a ridiculous outlook on love and life. What do you mean, love finds you? Should you sit back and wait for it to strike. Cupid ain't around anymore, if you want love, you need to hunt for it. Love will not find you, you must find love. A better signature would be "Destiny awaits those brave enough to accept it." Your current signature falls in tandem with your post... you can't find true love if you passively wait for it to strike you... think about it, yours truly probably is: good-looking, intelligent, confident, fun to be around. Now, if this girl exists (and she does) she is most likely approached a lot by guys because she is a catch, so do you really think she will one day fall for you because you take a passive role in life? You think NO? Good. We're on to a good start... for you to find the person you want to share life with you need to have experienced love and learned who YOU are. You can't sit by and hope that you win the lottery, you need to go out there.

So, change your SIGNATURE!!!!

[DuckyWucky]

So, change your SIGNATURE!!!!

For one thing, it's BuzzLiteBeer's philosophy on love, not MV Playa's. So he shouldn't change it if he doesn't want to. If someone has a sig. that says, "Jesus Saves" would you say change it because Alah is the one and only? It's just a different belief and outlook. Respect it, even though it's not what you think.

Don't get me wrong I do agree with you though. You need to put through an effort to meet people and see what's out there. I'm guessing his sig. implies that love finds you when you least expect it, rather than going out and saying, "I think I want to fall in love tonight." Get it?

[MVPlaya]

Originally posted by DuckyWucky
For one thing, it's BuzzLiteBeer's philosophy on love, not MVPlaya's. So he shouldn't change it if he doesn't want to. If someone has a sig. that says, "Jesus Saves" would you say change it because Alah is the one and only? It's just a different belief and outlook. Respect it, even though it's not what you think.

Don't get me wrong I do agree with you though. You need to put through an effort to meet people and see what's out there. I'm guessing his sig. implies that love finds you when you least expect it, rather than going out and saying, "I think I want to fall in love tonight." Get it?

I "Get it," homie, but I'm not sure its likewise. The reason I tackle his signature is not because I want him to follow my beliefs, but its because its a negative out look on life (if it said Jesus Saves or Allah Conquers All I wouldn't care).

- "I'm guessing his sig. implies that love finds you when you least expect it."
I disagree... if you read his post it seems as if he wants love to find him rather than go out and find it himself (read my first post on this thread). Basically, he wants the chicks to do all the work.

- "rather than going out and saying, 'I think I want to fall in love tonight.'"
You completely misunderstood me. My post was not about falling in love, its about taking an active role in life. And I sure as hell hope none of you fall in love in one night, I sure won't. I don't ever "want to fall in love tonight," it takes a while for me to develop a strong attraction to someone I'm seeing. What I stated referred to being an active participant, finding that "special someone" can take years, so why wait ages to enjoy life? So, if he wants to keep his sig, not my problem, I'm telling him to get a more positive outlook.

[whoa]

Originally posted by jane
Here's a thought,

How about being yourself? Ever thought a woman may actually like you for who you are?

hhhhhmmmm... imagine that?

sorry if i sound like an arse (wait nvm, im not sorry), but "just be yourself" is singularly the most trite and simply the worst platitude in the dating world. It gives people a reason to be lazy instead of self-improvement. In order to get girls/guys, you must be better than youself and strive for self-perfection. Get a hobby, pick up an instrument, read, in other words, IMPROVE YOUSELF. If my advice sounds bad, can you tell me one succesful relationship when "just be yourself" has worked? I mean, seriously, how ambiguous can this line get? So if i am a poor teenage boy sitting on my arse, munching on chips and watching Star Trek, if a hottie doesn't like me, its her fault, just because she "doesn't like me for who I am?" thats ridiculous. Personally, I'm so tired of this line that it should NEVER be uttered by anyone trying to give advice, just based on the fact that it NEVER WORKS.

[DuckyWucky]

Well ok.

[LunaStarDust82]

I say, don't try to fake something for someone else - because opinion on what is "sexy" or "attrative" to girls is gonna vary between them. Me, I find a guy who can drive stick or play guitar sexy. But then again, a lot of girls think a guy who plays sports is sexy.... All in all, depends on the girl

[jane]

Originally posted by whoa
Personally, I'm so tired of this line that it should NEVER be uttered by anyone trying to give advice, just based on the fact that it NEVER WORKS.

You right ... it's better to be fake and look ridiculous tring to be someone your not.

[MVPlaya]

Originally posted by jane
You right ... it's better to be fake and look ridiculous tring to be someone your not.

Whoa was a little too loud in his exclamation but the basic message is correct. Just Be Yourself if understood correctly is exactly what people need to be. But Just Be Yourself is ALWAYS misunderstood. Whenever someone complains about a social problem the first message they hear is Just Be Yourself... this is the easiest way to give advice without saying anything and more often than that a signal to the person of, "I'm myself, I do fine, you're yourself, so why do you suck?" The problem with most guys is that they are not themselves... they cover up themselves in some grandiose act because of fear that they will not be accepted and they have been doing this for so long that its no longer a conscious process. When we say Just Be Yourself it means keep doing what you're doing. Well, for some guys, they need to have the confidence to actualize the real self inside them and move beyond their phobias and insecurities about acceptance. For a guy who goes home and cries every night about his miseries Just Be Yourself means jack shit... this guys needs a more detailed reply. You can keep JBY'ing every guy with a problem and they will learn nothing because JBY does not give a concrete example of where to begin. For those reasons, DJ's never utter the phrase JBY because people don't TRULY understand who they are. We are not saying fake it and pretend you're someone else... we are saying, work on improving your weaknesses and don't be afraid to unleash what is inside you. For too many guys acceptance is so important that they could not imagine doing something (especially to a girl) that would make them like the guy less and as a result the guy has difficulty standing up for himself and commanding respect. The problem is insecurities... therefore, refrain from saying Just Be Yourself because for most people its a message fallen on deaf ears.

[jane]

wow, I guess I shouldn't give advice then.

You know what, i completely understand what you mean, however, I was trying to give ligitamet advice, however misconstude as it is.

I have said this in many other posts...

CONFIDENCE is how you get women. Period! You either have it or you don't. YOU as an individual need to figure out how to get that. EVERYONE has baggage they need to get rid of. How am I suppose to know what that is? All I can is , if I am being generic, it's because I am trying to be useful. I don't want to put my ideas in your head you need to figure out what is right for you.

[MVPlaya]

Give all the advice you want, just know that although you mean right with JBY, the person you say it to will probably not understand the real message behind it. And yes, confidence is key... that's where people must begin.

[jane]

I am not perfect by any means. I am not a therapist. I just am a person who has joined a forum. My advice may not eb the greatest.

When it comes to really figuring out you and why you have low self esteem, low body image or anything like that, it usual stems from some sort of trauma or maybe it's because women just scare you.

Woman are human! Don't be scared! Be happy that we are here on this planet. WOMEN = EAT, SLEEP, and SHIT JUST LIKE YOU !!
I believe thats what MVP posted in his Journal! READ IT!

[BuzzLiteBeer]

ok now everyone is ratting me for havung the wrong outlook on dating. I just wanted to know if these talents will impress a girl or not. I already know that I should be looking for someone who loves me for who I am.

[BuzzLiteBeer]

and now my sig!?! jesus christ stop bashin me!

[squirrley]

right on Jane! CONFIDENCE is the key. Women like a man who knows themself. Not arrogance, but a man who knows what they want in life and arent afraid of going after it!