Whats up with that

[vashti]

heh.. I like the poem.

But seriously, you are never going to feel comfortable about flirting if you never gain experience.

[bigfella247]

you're right there Vash. I can flirt and I have done it before. I do try and flirt with her at every opportunity. My problem at the mo is telling her how I feel, and I don't want to do it in front of her four million friends. I'm hoping to find a chance at her birthday on the 15th next month. Only I don't know how I want to tell her, whether it be an "I like you" as we bump into each other dancing or whether I catch her walking on her own and ask her whether she wants to go see a movie on the next weekend or even if I wanna try something completely different.

I'll finish by saying she is absolutely drop dead gorgeous, though everyone has that opinion about somebody in particular.

[vashti]

NO! Don't do that! Just say this:

Hey (girl' name)! How's it going? Hey, are you busy on Saturday? Because I'd really like to take you to see a movie if you are free."

Do not comment on her looks. You can do that later when it sounds more genuine and not like you are trying to worm yourself into a date. I bet she already knows she's pretty anyway.

If she seems interested, but can't make it, just ask her when she IS free.
If she says no, just smile brightly and say "Well, you can't blame a guy for trying!" and walk away. Do NOT let her see your hurt feelings.
If she says yes, ask her what time is good for her. Be sure to pay for your date (don't make it too expensive).

[bigfella247]

Hey (girl' name)! How's it going? Hey, are you busy on Saturday? Because I'd really like to take you to see a movie if you are free."

Sounds good...I'll try that one.

Do not comment on her looks.

Right, done.

I bet she already knows she's pretty anyway.

lol

If she seems interested, but can't make it, just ask her when she IS free.
If she says no, just smile brightly and say "Well, you can't blame a guy for trying!" and walk away. Do NOT let her see your hurt feelings.
If she says yes, ask her what time is good for her. Be sure to pay for your date (don't make it too expensive).

I had already cottoned on to the paying-for-date

Thanks for that Vashti, it means a lot.

[bigfella247]

I've got a couple more questions for you.

-I can foresee an inevitable awkward silence after I have asked her whether she'll go out with me. If she says no, I say something around the lines of what Vashti said earlier, leave and make sure I do not make obvious hurt feelings. From here do I avoid her for the rest of the party (keeping in mind that everyone will have to stay the night as she lives 3/4 hour away...thats a long time to avoid someone, though she does get very drunk at every party she goes to). But if she says yes chances are I'll just stand there dumbstruck and confused as to what happens immediately next. Do I move straight in for a hug? do I wait for her to make the next move? do I avoid her for the entire party (like I said before we all have to stay the night)?

-If she says she will go out with me do I hang around her for the night?...guardian of my newgotten booty...I could make sure she doesn't do anything stupid while she's drunk etc

as you can see I'm full of questions and have steered pretty well clear of asking girls out so far

PS: what do you think may chances of kissing her on the first night are? (as girlish as it may sound)

[Mathias]

PS: what do you think may chances of kissing her on the first night are? (as girlish as it may sound)

Unless you COMPLETELY bomb, you MUST go for this.

Oh, and don't do it when walking to her door. Too awkward, because she knows it's coming.

[bigfella247]

Unless you COMPLETELY bomb, you MUST go for this.

when? straight after asking her out

Oh, and don't do it when walking to her door. Too awkward, because she knows it's coming.

you mean don't ask her out as I rock up at hers for the party, but rather during the party when I see a good moment?