I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
(Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)
hulrush, no need for unqualified misogynist woman hater comments, she is responding as a female would be expected to.
Yes you're being a creep. because i'm sure there is a hint of "i still want you" in your interactions with her (because you ask the qeustions and wonder if she wants you... case closed).
So let's stop being a creep and do it right.
Let her know that your interest is just to get your belongings back. And ask if she still has them at all. If yes, let her know that you'll be happy to agree to any arrangement she's comfortable with so you can get your belongings back.. you will pay the cost. Whether that's going thru an intermediary she can leave the items with that you can then get them from. This includes pre-paying for the cost of shiping them back to you. This includes driving to a neutral site where they can hand off the items to you and she can bring whomever she wants to be there with her so she's not worried or nervous about interacting with you.
Whatever it is.. "i just want my things back please"...
If she says no.. you're stuck with that.. move on.
How am I being a creep for asking for my own stuff? I asked that woman to MAIL my stuff to me. I offered she can give the stuff to the security guards. I EVEN Told her that she can pay me the money if she threw the stuff out. A better way to title this thread is, "Is SHE being a creep and a b**ch for not returning my stuff to me?"
Its true I am using my stuff as an excuse to establish contact with her. But why wouldn't she just GIVE IT BACK and take away my reason for contacting her?
she is probably sending your messages to her friends with note "see why i dropped this loser"?
because she is mad at you and is easiest way to punish your behavior. i bet if you leave her alone for a few weeks she will return your stuff thru her new boyfriend who will warn you about bothering her ever again.
I am reading your posts in a creepy low voice and this whole thing gives me goosebumps. She doesn't want to deal with you anymore and that includes not even giving you the courtesy of returning your stuff. Stop reading into her behaviour to fit your desire she might in some way still want you.
Please elaborate how I am the creep when the only thing I've asked her to do is to return my stuff to me.
What right does she have to take my stuff and not give it back? I guess the very first post in this thread painted a dark picture of me. Is it because I used the word 'creep' to describe my own behavior?
All I want is my stuff back. Is that an unjust, unreasonable demand to make? How is that creepy? How is that me being unreasonable?
if she has possession of the "stuff" it is her "stuff" not your "stuff". if you want it back file a theft complaint with the police but you will have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you are the legal owner of the "stuff". Good Luck doing that. she can say you gave to her or is someone else's "stuff". since she has possession burden of proof falls on you to extract from her possession.
[MENTION=71368]omgtotallyxo[/MENTION] I Agree with you 100%. he wants her, but she has moved on to someone else. using "stuff" as excuse. Simple Revenge ploy but she is holding all the cards. i been there done that to ex's and always prevailed in the end.
She also has my business portfolio on her business website. She can easily delete me from there. Every time she posts something, she sees my name up there.
Here are the following reasons why I believe she isn't returning the stuff:
1) She doesn't want to let go (my favorite)
2) She is afraid of me (the worst possible reason but less likely because a frightened person would try their best to get rid of all outstanding dues to not have to deal with the person who scares them)
3) She is on a power trip and wants to show to me that she can get away with it (a reasonable explanation)
4) She wants to punish me (I like this option better because it means she still has some feelings for me)
5) She is angry (my favorite reason because it means that she has strong feelings for me)
6) She doesn't give a **** and thinks its a waste of time to even concern herself with the stuff (not plausible given the number of times I have sent her emails about my stuff)
Please take your pick.
One more clue for you is that she still has my business portfolio on her business website and she can easily get rid of me by the click of a button. Very easy.
Last edited by Bhujerba; 21-03-18 at 06:09 AM.
a narcissist guy will never let go, but he will eventually back off if she goes totally “no contact”. The narcissist will harbor anger, malice, and jealousy toward the target girl who ignores and disciples him, from time to time, if he between targets, he will attempt to contact her by using seemingly legitimate excuses. If she REALLY ignores him and the narcissist has no way in, you won’t know about it when the he tries to hoover around her by using an excuse to stalk her