Are these signs a man is interested?

[Applesauce]

Why are some women so eager to throw away professionalism for some d*ck from a guy who may or may not give a sh*t about them?

I don't understand this

Bc it's hard to ignore millions of years of evolution that have programmed females to be attracted to a high status male

[Crystal99]

I thought about that too vashti. Maybe someone spoke to him. But then again, we had the conversation about the desserts and 'you didn't bring me any?" "I want to taste some of them" in front of people. Yes, I do realize that this could pose problems. However, I think it would if something happened now. If I leave the school then I don't think I would worry about it so much.
Anyway, are you referring to my flirtations or his being noticed?

[Crystal99]

Anyway, I just want to know if it is a bad idea to bring in the homemade desserts. I really like the guy and would like to hear some advice on what moves to make. If it was just any guy that I met in class, at the movies, through a friend, i would not be asking bc it would be easier. Being that we work together and will continue to for another month, this is why I need some advice so that I don't look stupid. Regarding my flirtations, aside from the "dessert convo" I do everything very discreetly. I hardly pay him much attention when people are around, just typical, "hi, good morning, bye" type of thing. Last week I was working on another floor and he passed by 3 days in a row just to say hi. This week he only did it once early in the week. Maybe he was just superbusy, I don't know what to think but I don't know if I am ballsy enough to invite him out to lunch LOL in a casual way.

[humili]

Yes. He is in love with you! These are always the act older men do when they are interested.

Since I been through a bit in love, here is my suggestions!

1) You have nothing to fear when it comes to love cos true love overcomes a lot of fear and insecurity.
2) I suspected he might been through bad romance in his younger days. So you need to validate if he is the one you really want.
3) I mean a lot of people who are young fell in love and regret later!!! Ask yourself what you are truly looking for if you want a serious relationship and the pressure you have to face when u are with him.

We are young and love attention! I mean at almost 34, I still feel like a little gal! But is this the relationship path you really want!

Hope I clear some thghts in your mind!

Cheers!
Chua

[Charlie Boy II]

Life is good for men 27-35. Yew! So much opportunity, in almost every sense.

[Crystal99]

Thanks for the insight Charlie Boy. Any advice on my actual question? Does anyone take this forum seriously and actually answer questions?

[Charlie Boy II]

Yes he likes you. Yes you should bring him desert.

[Applesauce]

Charlie Boy II says:

"Life is good for men 27-35. Yew! So much opportunity, in almost every sense."

yup, I'm 26 and I get hit on by all kinds of women - older, younger. It's great

[LailaK]

I don't know what happened to my edited comment but I meant to add that I would appreciate it if we did not assume that this guy is bad without knowing him. He seems very family-oriented and has a good personality. Also, comments such as 'throw away professionalism for d**k from a guy who doesn't care about them" makes it sound like I am some tramp. Please leave the social stigmas of the majority of today's young woman out of this. I take months to sleep with a man and first establish a friendship. So I would never be an office slut. Sorry LailaK but I am not looking to 'mess around."

You don't have to apologize to me. I could care less if you're looking to mess around.

You do have to realize though that by flirting with him at work some of your co-workers may assume the very things that you're making it clear you're not about in your post. Just a word of advice to keep your romantic flirtations outside of the work place. People love gossip and they will label you whatever they please with the tiniest spec of evidence (whether it's true or not).

My most recent ex is someone I met at work. (Not my boss. I would never do that, it's insanely unprofessional) It is not something I recommend, but the way we went about it NO ONE at work knew unless we told them. We never flirted at work. No winks, no holding hands, no private conversations. At work we were completely professional. We said hi to each other in the halls maybe, but that was it. There are a lot of people at my job who are engaged or married to one another but you wouldn't be able to tell from watching them at work. Personally I believe romantic interactions have no place in the work place. Men may be able to get away with it but I think it makes women look bad and can hurt their careers and reputations.

[LailaK]

Bc it's hard to ignore millions of years of evolution that have programmed females to be attracted to a high status male

It's not hard to ignore at all. I ignore it all the time.

[Crystal99]

I was sick and stayed home with a terrible cold for the past two days:-( So I never gave the dessert. However, on Monday we were having a brief discussion about friendships and relationships at work and school. He said that he stays away from most people but remains dimplomatic and tries to have a good relationship with everyone. However, he included that he sees me as closer to him and as "one of those who is a little more special than others."

Is this just friendliness or pointing toward something more?

[YouAreBeautiful]

Crystal I think we have been answering your questions. It seems you haven't gotten the answers you want. I think it's probably headed toward more than a friendship, but he is proceeding in a very cautious manner suggesting something is holding him back. Maybe he is unsure of your feelings or unsure of how things will work out in the work place after you two start a relationship. My advice is to wait patiently. Gve him another clue, strong but not too strong. The desserts were a good idea. Don't do anything that exceeds the amount of flirtatious effort that he is putting out toward you. Hope this helps.

[Crystal99]

Crystal I think we have been answering your questions. It seems you haven't gotten the answers you want. I think it's probably headed toward more than a friendship, but he is proceeding in a very cautious manner suggesting something is holding him back. Maybe he is unsure of your feelings or unsure of how things will work out in the work place after you two start a relationship. My advice is to wait patiently. Gve him another clue, strong but not too strong. The desserts were a good idea. Don't do anything that exceeds the amount of flirtatious effort that he is putting out toward you. Hope this helps.

Thank you for your post. It really shed some light on things. It may be possible that he is not sure of my feelings. I am unsure myself, if I have shown enough signs other than just "thank you's" for compliments and favors, a lot of smiles, and the coffee I gave to him. Maybe to guys this is not enough??? I will bring in the desserts like you advise me to do. Would it be wrong to feed him a bite? or is that going a bit overboard on my end?

Part of me wants to say, "let's go for coffee somewhere," but I am afraid to ask. I want him to do it. Some people tell me it's ok to ask, but I won't do it.

[febling]

He's making it painfully clear he likes you.

But likes you for what? Being a guy, all these things he's telling you- how he can't get along with girls, treating you "special"- kind of gives me a creepy vibe. You may become his pet project. Him not getting along with girls might mean he hasn't gotten laid in a while.

Not trying to scare you, but reading your original post, I kept thinking of Bill Clinton Bill Clinton Bill Clinton over and over and over.

[Crystal99]

Bill Clinton? How does my story remind you of him? He seemed to be getting laid left and right.