Hoping he will call

[TheEvilJester]

I definitely know how you feel. When you sort of had a crush, it can be hard to let go of it right away. Even if/when it proves unlikely, if/when it goes poorly, or like in your case you just begin to think nothing is ever going to happen so you choose to move on.... that doesn't mean the way you feel is just going to magically disappear.

That is why, even though you now realize that probably nothing will ever happen, there is still part of you wishing it could. There is still part of you having a hard time keeping him out of your head. Believe me, in time that will fade away. Really, you never do know. Maybe in time he'll finally wake the heck up and take a chance. Maybe, IF he does, he'll do so before it is too late.

But, as you've already realized, no need to wait around hoping that will happen. IF he's interested, he blew his chance. If he's not interested, that probably won't change. Either way, though, you deserve somebody who will jump at the chance to go out with you, not somebody you need to drag into it, wondering whether they even have any interest in the first place.

Good luck to you. Believe me, in time it won't be so hard to forget him. In time, you'll wonder why the heck you ever bothered to wait even as long as you did. You'll wonder what you even saw in him. In fact, when you wind up meeting a guy who actually DOES make the effort to woo you, you'll begin to ponder with past you was insane. LOL! I hope you find that fella very soon.

[SeptemberBaby]

Definitely moving on. Although it is hard to get him out of my head. I keep thinking about him. But, I am tired of doing the chasing. And what do I get out of it anxiety and stress. Saw him the other day I think he was waiting for a wave from me first but I could not do it. I should not have to be the only one trying. I know it sounds selfish but, I would like to get some response from him without me going first.

NO NO NO!!

You are saying that it's hard for you to get him out of your head.

What you haven't mentioned is that you must actually quite like this guy, yeah? You have noticed him, gave him your number in a Christmas card. I know it's really hard for a girl to ask a guy out, but you know, he's shy.

If you do ask him out, maybe it seems pushy (although a guy like this might want that). The best thing you can do is ask him the question "Why didn't you call me?", perhaps with a smile. Because if you leave the situation as it is, you will never get full closure; you will always think in the back of your mind "What if I had asked him out directly?" or something like that.

As a man I can tell you, guys of certain ages are loaded with testosterone and when they're like that they're moody and uncommunicative and prone to negative thinking. That's why they listen to angry crap like some metal band. He may even be a bit autistic... or maybe he is not that interested in you.

Either way, you will keep wondering and wont ever REALLY know if you don't wear the pants and ask a question like the one I suggested. You said you can't stop thinking about him, yeah? If he says 'no' to you then that will definitely help you to stop thinking about him, because you will get your closure.

[geicoad]

b agressive

[Irene123]

I saw him the other day. Unfortunately I wasn't feeling well and he was hanging out the window. I smiled and that was it because I did not feel like talking to anyone. Major headache. I hope he didn't read that wrong. That was over a week ago and haven't seen him since, as usual. I kniow I should be more aggressive. I still feel he should have called. It has been over a month. It was an obvious green light. This would go so much better if he would approach me.

[Wakeup]

He's not interested in doing that though. If he was, he would approach. Just forget about him. Time to consider him invisible.

[TheEvilJester]

Honestly, many of us have been saying to just move on since he seems not to be interested. Maybe it is just me, but I'm beginning to feel you are sure about that answer. So, honestly, if it would make you feel better, just try being more direct, and if that still does not work, move on then. Here's the bottom line, obviously he's not going to make the first move. You've waited around hoping he would, even so much as giving him a pretty obvious green light to do so, and he's still not done it. Again, most of us take that to mean he's either not interested or even if he is, he's not worth waiting around to find out if he'll ever finally get up the courage to go for it.

However, if you just honestly feel like you'll be just left wondering if you don't give it a shot, then just try the more direct approach and ask him out. Again, personally I think it sounds like you basically already did that even if you didn't really come right out and say it. But, if you feel like you'd otherwise just be tortured wondering, then ask him out if it will make you happy. Then, at least you'll know for sure.

Again, I will reiterate that I personally think it sounds like you've done enough already, and obviously some of the others agree with me. So, that wouldn't personally be my first advice, but sometimes in life we do just need to try for something even if we know it isn't likely to work out. Sometimes you just need to know for sure rather than to be left wondering, so maybe this is one of those times for you. Good luck either way.