I'm dont know what to do, can yall help me?

[blue]

well time heals al wounds and this too will pass, you deserve someone who just wants to be with you and only you. just know u deserve better!!!!

[stardust]

Shes confused!! arghh! im going crazy just reading that! so lets just go through this again, at first she says she may cheat on you with her ex if you two get back together, then she starts begging you to go out with her, then she says your a close friend who she needs???? whats going on!!! confused or what? You poor thing! I'm afraid she's being really selfish, she doesnt really know what se wants as her opinion on you is constantly changing. You cant base a relationship on that surely! She wants you to be there as a shoulder to cry on but shes also playing around with your head and that is so unfair! If you love her then this must hurt you, I think its unfair, she cant give you what you want because she barely knows it herself! Stop hurting yourself any more. Realsie that she cannot give you what you want and get on with your life. x x

[paco2244]

So much has happened, but I'll try and say just what I need to. We've been talking, and she doesn't feel how she used, as in she doesn't know if she wants to be with me forever anymore, but she wants to be my girlfriend now.

For one thing, a couple of nights ago I basically asked her "me or your ex". She couldn't answer me and needed a day to think about it. This hurt, that she couldn't decide between me and this guy. She said the only thing reason she wants to be with him is because he's something new. It took her a day, I knew she would pick me, but you know what, I really didn't care, because if she had to think about it, we're not at the same levels. Then when she told me that, I told her that I'm not going to be with you if your not like you were before, and basically said she'd think about if she wanted to be with me forever and tell me tomorrow. I was thinking, there is no way she can truly come up for an answer for that, and it kind of stupid wants you look at it. We're young (16) but I still love her more than anything and WANT to be with her forever, we always used to talk about, and even have the names of our kids.

Anyways, she comes back and tells me she wants to be with me, and potentially be soulmates. This wasn't good enough for me, and I said that I was to stupid to think that you could ever think that now, and I shouldn't of lead us on. So I told her, no. She asked me what's my decision, I told her this is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, I told her no. It really was the hardest, I love her more than life, I'd die for this girl like that *snaps*. I had to get off the phone, and she told me that we need to finish this converstaion later tonight.

When we weren't talking I was starting to get second thoughts. Isn't it too much to ask for her everlasting love right now? Even though she used to feel the same way, but she changed. She says she wants to be together "as long as it lasts." Should I risk getting hurt to be with her, and potentially be more? Take in thought that I love this girl more than anything. Or, should I move on? There's already some other chick thats making moves on me, and I'm actually a little interested in her. I know it wouldn't last long, but it its a sign that I can move on. If i could choose my ex over her, I choose my ex without hesitiation. Because we have something more than a mere little fling, we love each other (I know she loves me).

When I actually told her about the other girl, she started crying and asking all these questions, like how I used to about her old boyfriend. Like "do you like her?" "do you think she's pretty?" "is she more pretty than me". She basically made a huge deal out of it, because I walked this girl to class and gave her hug. We did make a promise to each other to act like we had a boyfriend/girlfriend (we go to different schools). I didn't flirt with her, she actually was on some bars and couldn't walk straight, so I walked her to class.

Should I risk it? Yalls comments would be great.

[Joe_Watson]

If she has to "think about it" to choose between you and her ex, you've got your answer. Break up with her. Trust me, you'll save yourself a lot more pain in the future, if you just break up with her now.

If she only wants the other guy because he's something new, that means she's really just not that into you anymore and you should move on. It also means she has no respect for you at all if she has to "choose". She doesn't really care about you. She seems shallow and stupid.

She says she wants to be together "as long as it lasts."

This basically means that it "lasts" until she gets bored of you, which she already has, it seems like. And it's no fault of yours. She just decided she wanted someone "new" as she told you before. Do you get where I'm coming from
Do you really want to be in a relationship with someone THIS shallow? You can do better, man.

I know it's hard and I know what it feels like, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Tell her it's over and don't look back. Best of luck and I really hope you meet someone a lot better in the future. You don't deserve this. No one does. Please keep us posted.

There's already some other chick thats making moves on me, and I'm actually a little interested in her.

Maybe after you break up with her, you can hook up with the hot chick that's making the moves on you? See, you've already met someone new and all you have to do is let this one go. Somebody that loves you wouldn't do this to you and make you feel this way. Maybe you'll find TRUE love with this new girl you're talking about. Don't be afraid to move on and meet new people.

It can only get better, man. Just move on. Ask the other chick out and let us now how that turns out. If she's putting the moves on you, there's not really a risk, but more like a probability that she'll want to go out with you. Good luck, man.

[Blazin Trav]

Drop her like a brick.

[stardust]

I think you know what you need to do to be honest!! you seem to have enough doubts about her! i think you already realise that shes no good!

[kaotic02]

man yer 16 years old, you got your whole life ahead of you. dont let this girl stop and slow you down. i admire your will power to end it with her. i really do man. i and everyone else who read this thread knows how hard it must have been.just know you make men proud to be men. you proved her wrong that you arent wrapped around her finger, and you're not her little *****. this is a game to her, she thinks she can get whatever she wants. this is a game she lost. she lost interest in you once she realized how much you cared about her and how she knew you would never leave her. but as soon as you flipped it on her and showed you werent gonna be around no matter what she got scared and panicked.

[paco2244]

Hello everyone, wow it has been a long time. Man, it's crazy looking back and reading this, I can't believe I got myself into that.

I wanted to post on here, to show people here who may have problems, and loved someone like I did, that you WILL get better. It's been what, almost 2 years since all that happen? Let me tell you, I never even think about her anymore, ever. Actually, I find it amusing how I was acting, that this girl that was treating me so wrong had me around her finger. The few months after that break up were rough, some of the roughest months I've ever had, I thought that I wouldn't ever get over her, and she would always be on my mind. I was wrong, I'm doing much better, have other women in my life, and let me tell you, I'm GLAD that this happen to me, you know why? Because going through this made me so much stronger, and smarter. I'm a better person after going through that.

Thanks again to everyone for helping me through this on here, I appreciate it so much.

[Gigabitch]

IMO, this isn't going to get better. Better do some damage control: Walk away now while you still have some self-respect intact.

[Mathias]

IMO, this isn't going to get better. Better do some damage control: Walk away now while you still have some self-respect intact.

This is a highly underrated thing.

Some people tell you that self-respect doesn't matter when you are in a situation like this, but that's completely untrue.

It's MUCH harder to get over someone when you left with no self-respect, because you have to get that back IN ADDITION to getting over the girl/guy.

[paco2244]

IMO, this isn't going to get better. Better do some damage control: Walk away now while you still have some self-respect intact.

thanks man, i guess you didnt catch the dates, i first posted that about 2 years ago, I just wanted to come back and tell everyone that I'm doing better even tho I never thought I would, and that you will too eventually

[Gigabitch]

thanks man, i guess you didnt catch the dates, i first posted that about 2 years ago, I just wanted to come back and tell everyone that I'm doing better even tho I never thought I would, and that you will too eventually

Hey, that's awesome! No, I didn't even look at the date on it (Oops).

So what did you do? How did you get better?

And can you go and post something to SWLR on the "First Breakup" thread?

[SWLR]

I'm GLAD that this happen to me, you know why? Because going through this made me so much stronger, and smarter. I'm a better person after going through that.

Thats inspiring. Thank you, Paco2244

[Mathias]

Paco--great story, and thank you for sharing.

[Binxy]

I just love this thread. I caught the dates when I first started reading it. I was wondering how it would end up. It was inspiring to see how you had moved on and have a great life now. You were suffering so much over this girl, and as I said, I think it's inspiring to others because they can see you actually going through all the things they're going through, but then they get to fast forward a couple of years and see how it all worked out and how that time in your life was just a blurb....a type of learning experience.

Thank you so much, and thanks for the update on your life. I'm glad your doing well. Your an inspiration to all of us.