Sexual History

[2 diff animals]

Dude.. that is a slut, man. She will cheat on you. Find a nice Christian girl.. You can't turn a whore into a housewife!

[Rob26]

She may or may not be an ex-slut. I think women who were sluts due to lack of self-esteem can (and often do) change. Some women LIKE to be sluts, though.

[TAVS]

One of those 14 other men are bound to be better in the sack than you; one day she's going to think of that and start cheating.

[clynn]

Yah, stay with her. You're young...and so is she...but at least you know she'll have gotten it out of her system!

[dono]

Hmm... I'd say dump her, and go after a virgin. No matter how bad in bed you are (and I'm not saying you're bad, because I wouldn't know) a virgin will never know, because it's her first time. Hehehe... I'm evil.

[clynn]

Hmm... I'd say dump her, and go after a virgin. No matter how bad in bed you are (and I'm not saying you're bad, because I wouldn't know) a virgin will never know, because it's her first time. Hehehe... I'm evil.

Don't be silly.

If she loves him, and it sound like she definitely does.........she will not be comparing her one night stands to him, not a chance.

Sex with someone you love can't for a second compete with random meaningless sex.

[Tone]

Sex with someone you love can't for a second compete with random meaningless sex.

I agree with clynn.

[dono]

Sorry bro, i was just messing with you.

Sex with someone you love can't for a second compete with random meaningless sex.

I really do agree with this too.

[misombra]

just out of curiousity, what is her home/family life like?

[Debunkt]

There's some harsh ass people here. I have explained before that self-esteem is something we gain through the actions and words of those around us, we're not born with it. We are all in situations in which our confidence and esteem can waver, so its up to those around us to not take advantage of that. These guys in the past probably did to some extent. Its easy, it happens, but it IS the past. This guy seems like he will take care of this girl, and most people will know not to bite the hand that feeds. No point in ruining a good thing, right? So why would she cheat? Even with past sexual partners, there's no indication that she'd cheat. Being promiscuous =/= cheating. Some of you people would seriously have trouble manning up in that situation, and throw away a potentially wonderful thing because you're scared she might cheat or think about someone else. OMG! Guess what? ALL relationships are a risk, so no point in nit-picking if someones honestly going to love and appreciate you.

Dude.. that is a slut, man. She will cheat on you. Find a nice Christian girl.. You can't turn a whore into a housewife!

STFU, nub.

I will remove the cross that dangles in the cleavage
of every christian chick who thinks her tits are saving jesus!

[Prodigal]

If this all happened before you two got together... then maybe you should consider staying if you like her so much. I think that people can learn from these mistakes, however huge they may be. It's showing a definite lack of resistance to temptation and the such... but hopefully she's better.

If another situation comes up, whether by hearing about something in the past or in the present, then dump her. Lying twice about something like this is enough. It should be clear that it seems more important to you that she tells the truth... and she should know that. So if anything, and I mean anything, of the sort comes up again, then I'd say dump her, no questions asked and with no chance at another shot. The way I see it, this already is her last chance (and honestly, I believe she has gotten more chances than she deserves).

[Only-virgins]

Let's put the fact that you're dating a slut aside, I think you are going to run into a lot of trust/honesty issues with her. You're going to have to be up front and honest with your concerns. Good luck.

Haha, I agree. Cough*slut*Cough

We've talked about this before, of course. Women, generally, consider it ultimately satisfying to convince a man to settle with them. Men want to have multiple partners with no commitment. Thus, it's easier for women to accept a man's history because she's the one who "won" him. The reverse is true for men. For him, it means that he wasn't good enough for her to have casual sex with but rather he had to commit fully to her to get it.

Don't tell people the truth Rob, they cant handle it.

There's some harsh ass people here. I have explained before that self-esteem is something we gain through the actions and words of those around us, we're not born with it. We are all in situations in which our confidence and esteem can waver, so its up to those around us to not take advantage of that. These guys in the past probably did to some extent. Its easy, it happens, but it IS the past. This guy seems like he will take care of this girl, and most people will know not to bite the hand that feeds. No point in ruining a good thing, right? So why would she cheat? Even with past sexual partners, there's no indication that she'd cheat. Being promiscuous =/= cheating. Some of you people would seriously have trouble manning up in that situation, and throw away a potentially wonderful thing because you're scared she might cheat or think about someone else. OMG! Guess what? ALL relationships are a risk, so no point in nit-picking if someones honestly going to love and appreciate you.

tatatara! The slut defense attorney has arrived!

Dude, shut up, slut is a slut, a leopard never changes its spots and either way its neevr about the future, we are talking about the past, NOT THE FUTURE.

[clynn]

I like what Debunkt has to say....again.

And to add, it sounds like guys phoning her up is a problem. You may want to ask her to not keep in touch with all of these guys. That seems very fair.

[Debunkt]

tatatara! The slut defense attorney has arrived!

Dude, shut up, slut is a slut, a leopard never changes its spots and either way its neevr about the future, we are talking about the past, NOT THE FUTURE.

Wow. Couldn't think of an actual rebuttal?

Spots on a leopard are a physical characteristic they'll have no matter what. Being a slut is what happens when people judge you for your actions, no matter when they occured or if the person has changed. People aren't animals. We are capable of self-realization, introspection, complex emotion, and a whole gamut of attirbutes that makes it SO obvious that its not worth it to judge people by their past. OV, you went on a date recently. Did you know anything about the girls past? No. You didn't even know she had a bf. You were thinking instead about... THE FUTURE! OMG! Surprise! You're wrong! It is about the future, and what we expect to happen with that person. We date and court people to find out what they ARE like, not what they WERE like. I'm sure a time will come when you actually won't want people to think of you as an arrogant geek who is too quick to judge, and rather just part of your past. Or you may not even tell them about that part of yourself. Either way, it will not be something you'll want to be judged by. Let's face it: if were all so busy with finding fault in others, we'd never find anybody we can actually stand. Most people can't even come to terms with themselves, much less find it easy to have others love them. The number of partners someone has had does not define their ability to love, care, and be faithful to someone.

Your witness, biatch.

[bluesummer]

Dude, shut up, slut is a slut, a leopard never changes its spots and either way its neevr about the future, we are talking about the past, NOT THE FUTURE.

Untrue OV. My sister used to be a 'slut' if you will. She was going through a tough time in her life as a young teen.....a move to a completely different place, my parents divorce, low self esteem. The only time she felt 'loved' or 'accepted' was when a guy wanted to sleep with her. Now that I think about it, my best friend was the same way. She also equated sex with love, as a teenager. She came from a divorced abusive home, and started sleeping around early to feel 'loved'.

Now both have grown up, happily married to wonderful partners that treat them with respect. Both have realized the error of their ways, and have no desire to return to that lifestyle, because they know it was wrong. People DO mature and change and learn from their mistakes. So we can't just slap labels on people and assume the worst all the time. Especially with teenagers. They've still got a lot of growing up to do, and changes to go through.