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Thread: Question for those who are happily married

  1. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    I just hope Amy agrees, b/c these kinds of money issues are just the kinds of things that young couples argue over. But from all you've said, she seems very sensible.
    Hey now.

    Who knows if I'll ever get married, and even if I do, we can't just assume it'll be to Amy.

    However, hypothetically: if it was Amy, I know she's the sensible type that doesn't get caught up in the romanticism of weddings. Thank, God.

    I've been thinkin' about maybe movin' back to New Orleans and continuing the rebuilding. I think she would be up for it to, because I know she loves the work. I can already see her going back to case working with one of the non-profits while I got my hands dirty with the construction aspect of things.

    All this is frivolous right now, but for once in my life, I'm not completely lost as to the direction I'd like my life to head.

    Indi, are you married?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Frasbee View Post
    Indi, are you married?
    Oh yes. For over 15 years. He was my second BF. I'm his first. He knew quality when he saw it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by vashti View Post
    The feeling you are describing is better known as chemistry, and is a result of a chemical process in the body. Studies show that chemistry disappears after a year or two. Once it is gone, it is gone for good. Many people get "addicted" to the feeling, though, which is why they jump from relationship to relationship.

    Lasting relationships are not based on chemistry, but rather with the sense of commitment that follows its demise. This is why you hear every now and then about people having a successful marriage after beginning as friends (and even those who didn't like each other at first).

    I think it is important for couples to share similar values and life goals if they are to have a strong marriage. Also, a person has to be lucky... Very lucky. Also, "happiness" is a transitory feeling. If you are expecting a long term relationship to look anything like what you had in the first few years on a day-to-day basis, you are bound to be disappointed.
    I agree with Vash, with emphasis being on commitment. This principle imo plays a very important part on continuity and well being of a relationship.

    Although I am not entirely sure if relationship becomes devoid of chemistry after a couple of years. I remember reading that the initial infatuation gets replaced by other types of chemistry further down the line. The feelings become similar to ones we feel for our family or close old friends.
    Don't cry, don't regret and don't blame
    Weak find the whip, willing find freedom
    Towards the sun, carry your name
    In warm hands you are given
    Ask the wind for the way
    Uncertainty's gone, your path will unravel
    Accept all as it is and do not blame
    God or the Devil
    ~Born to Live - Mavrik~

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