pedophiles...ughhhh

[carl1222]

basically i think that she's more disgusted because she got hit on by an UGLY old man. ****, if someone like brad pitt had hit on her, i think that things would be different.

putting people into a general category always gets you in trouble. always...

raverboy

That's a great point, raverboy, girls want the guys they find attractive to hit on them, but cry foul when a guy who they aren't attracted to does. Sorry, it just doesn't work that way. Brad Pitt and /or George Clooney are excellent examples of "older" men that many much younger women might repond to. The fact that this guy may have been attracted to an inappropriately younger WOMAN doesn't make him a pedophile by any stretch of the imagination, it doesn't even make him a creep (although I agree he's a creep for his behavior).

Carl.

[Aeradalia]

You're an adult now... I think you're just not used to the expansive age gap in guys who can now 'legally' hit on you. You're young, naive, and therefore an easy target.

I would suggest you get used to this... learn how to politely refuse (and be more forceful if the situation warrants it)... and carry on with life. Refusing a 40 something man is no different than refusing a 19 year old 'boy'... as they are both 'adults' exercising their legal right to pursue you.

Isn't being an adult great?

[Bo]

Really?!

In this day in age, don't go around flinging terms like that about people... You admit to being legal, and you admit to buying beer. By definition the guy wasn't a pedophile.

And no it's not creepy either... He probably noticed your friend buying beer... assumed you were the legal and went for it. Can't blame the guy for hitting on a consenting adult.

That being said, STARING at you was down right creepy... If anything he was probably a rapist. Next time be like "No means No" and put the window up.

Well actually to clarify a couple things he might not have been a pedophile...he probably was though. And he was hitting on me before he saw our friend coming out with the beer. So basically i looked like a sixteen yr old in my car on the phone with a couple friends in the back. That is creepy...and then he certainly came on stronger after he saw the beer which makes sense. And that's when i kept saying no we're not going to follow you and then closed my window when he left.

[Bo]

He's still a creep, but that doesn't even come close to making him a pedophile.

i really do think he was a pedophile...errrr correction 'rapist'. I'm sure if i was dumb enough to go follow him and his friend back to whatever 'party' they had presented to us we would have gotten raped.

[Bo]

That's a great point, raverboy, girls want the guys they find attractive to hit on them, but cry foul when a guy who they aren't attracted to does. Sorry, it just doesn't work that way. Brad Pitt and /or George Clooney are excellent examples of "older" men that many much younger women might repond to. The fact that this guy may have been attracted to an inappropriately younger WOMAN doesn't make him a pedophile by any stretch of the imagination, it doesn't even make him a creep (although I agree he's a creep for his behavior).

Carl.

Ok, that's true to an extent. Even if i thought George clooney was attractive though i'd still be creeped out if he hit on me because of his age. And i think it would be different if i looked older but again i look very young and if i wasn't driving i'd probably look 15.

[Bo]

You're an adult now... I think you're just not used to the expansive age gap in guys who can now 'legally' hit on you. You're young, naive, and therefore an easy target.

I would suggest you get used to this... learn how to politely refuse (and be more forceful if the situation warrants it)... and carry on with life. Refusing a 40 something man is no different than refusing a 19 year old 'boy'... as they are both 'adults' exercising their legal right to pursue you.

Isn't being an adult great?

I've been hit on by older men but it was the manner in which he was doing it that really hit me as 'there's something wrong here'. I did even in this case, politely refuse. He was trying hard to point out that there would be tons of alcohol and a party going on...now come on, even if i did look 18 i sure do not look 21 and i won't look 21 even when i am 21. So here's this 40+ looking man trying to coax 4 underage looking girls back to his friend's place to drink? hmmm

and by the way Fras, i'm not looking for sympathy. I don't feel bad for myself...this just gave me the creeps.

[Junket]

I've been hit on by older men but it was the manner in which he was doing it that really hit me as 'there's something wrong here'. I did even in this case, politely refuse. He was trying hard to point out that there would be tons of alcohol and a party going on...now come on, even if i did look 18 i sure do not look 21 and i won't look 21 even when i am 21. So here's this 40+ looking man trying to coax 4 underage looking girls back to his friend's place to drink? hmmm

and by the way Fras, i'm not looking for sympathy. I don't feel bad for myself...this just gave me the creeps.

He gave you the creeps so you called him a pedophile.

Why don't you just report him and have him arrested and filed as a sex offender because he gave you the creeps? That's justifiable considering you're so sure he's likes to f*ck babies.

[Illusional]

haha trust me, even for an asian you don't look 15. here's the facts, you probably won't agree with me, but here goes.

the reason why many people tell you that you look under than you do is because people don't expect you to be 19. i went through the same thing. most people who have way older, don't spend much of their times with younger people, especially those around your age. they only assume that you're probably older than you are because they don't want to offend you.

when you think about it, many how many around your age can give you a better guestimate of your age?? i'm sure that those guesses would be a lot closer to that of an elder person because they can better relate to you age.

raverboy

[Aeradalia]

I look fairly young for my age... however when I do ask people how old I look... they will usually give me two answers... based on appearance alone I seem a lot younger than my age. However, when you include mannerism -- the way I talk and how I carry myself --- then they will usually guess closer to my actual age.

The guy may not be going off of looks alone... he might've watched your mannerisms and assumed you were older than your appearance.. and in that regard, he would be correct.

So before you write someone off as a potential pedophile or rapist... take into consideration their thought-process might be a little more complex than your initial impression.

He was a 40 something guy... right? There might be a tiny possibility that he might've gathered more information about you than you considered possible.

[vashti]

Bo - I totally believe in going with your instincts. If you think the guy was up to no good, you can bet your ass he was up to no good. Don't try to intellectualize your instincts away - they are there for a reason, and can save you from dangerous situations. This isn't a court of law, and you are not obligated to give creepy people the benefit of doubt unless you are sitting in a jury box.

[carl1222]

Ok, that's true to an extent. Even if i thought George clooney was attractive though i'd still be creeped out if he hit on me because of his age. And i think it would be different if i looked older but again i look very young and if i wasn't driving i'd probably look 15.

I think your real objection is to older men being attracted to younger women. My objection is to your casual use of the word "pedophile" to describe this.

1) 18 year old boy attracted to a 12 year old girl = pedophile.
2) 60 year old man attracted to an 18 year old woman = NOT pedophile.

Just be careful how you use terms, Bo.

Carl.

[Junket]

Bo - I totally believe in going with your instincts. If you think the guy was up to no good, you can bet your ass he was up to no good. Don't try to intellectualize your instincts away - they are there for a reason, and can save you from dangerous situations. This isn't a court of law, and you are not obligated to give creepy people the benefit of doubt unless you are sitting in a jury box.

Nothing wrong with following her instincts, but spotting a pedophile is worth mentioning to the authorities.

If she saw this man soliciting some 14 year old girls (or she was one), it's worth bringing up to authorities. But that's clearly not the case.

[tooxshort]

The guy may not be going off of looks alone... he might've watched your mannerisms and assumed you were older than your appearance.. and in that regard, he would be correct.

So before you write someone off as a potential pedophile or rapist... take into consideration their thought-process might be a little more complex than your initial impression.

He was a 40 something guy... right? There might be a tiny possibility that he might've gathered more information about you than you considered possible.

I agree that mannerisms make a big difference, but I think the guy walked up to her while she was in a car. Isn't there a limited amount of mannerisms one can do in a car?

If she was the driver, he could have assumed she was at least 16.

[Lonely Island]

Why cant people try for others their own age?

[Aeradalia]

Why cant people try for others their own age?

Many reasons... sometimes their maturity is above or below their age.... they're not really looking for love --- just lust... or everything they want in a person happens to be in someone older or younger than themselves...

There are other reasons... but these are the ones that come to mind..