I'm in trouble...don't know what to do

[Yggdrasil]

Thanks so much for answer, and I will look into those guys. I think i already some stuff on David de Angelo.

One qstn - have you heard of doc love?

Yeah, he's way off on quite a few things.

[nardAJC]

The cause? Shyness is not a pathological disease. It's a personality trait. The way you get over it is by forcing yourself to think about something other than your own uncomfortable feelings, and to ACT in spite of being uncomfortable. Shy people tend to elevate their feelings above all else.

I do see what you are saying, however, there is some debate as to whether shyness is indeed a psychopathology. I have looked into this as I am training to be a psychiatrist. Obviously shyness exists on a continuum, but I am not sure that when shyness inhibits one from performing what society deems as very normal social activities, and causes an individual significant distress- I am not convinced it is nota mental illness. In addition, there is certain biological evidence to suggest this.

And it is not entirely clear that if shyness is just a personality trait (inherent to the person, or a 'learned behaviour')- that it should not be seen as a personality disorder.

That what makes this so hard. That, in a certain way, us shy people could be battling against our biology- and we can never win against our biology.

Any thoughts on this is very much welcome.....

[nardAJC]

Yeah, he's way off on quite a few things.

What particular things? One person told me to 'live by his rules' and all these people praising him. I have read answers to his letters, but not his main work.

[Illusional]

i wonder why do people start the exact same thread in multiple forums??

raverboy

[nardAJC]

i wonder why do people start the exact same thread in multiple forums??

raverboy

sorry- this was my fist post here, and I really wasn't sure of the most appropriate forum

[Illusional]

i wonder why do people start the exact same thread in multiple forums??

raverboy

[vashti]

Seek cognitive therapy.

[Illusional]

it's cool... this is the first time that i deiced to ask before closing a thread, but i seen that you already had numerous replies to both threads, so i decided to ask.

raverboy

[nardAJC]

Seek cognitive therapy.

I havent seen any evidence that CBT is more efficacious than placebo.

have you personally seen it help people with problems of this nature?

[nardAJC]

it's cool... this is the first time that i deiced to ask before closing a thread, but i seen that you already had numerous replies to both threads, so i decided to ask.

raverboy

'closing a thread'? Should I delete my thread in the other forums and just leave it one....I really should have researched this site more before posting, haha

Peace

[Illusional]

it's cool. i left it open because of the numerous replies... just nominate me for coolest moderator when you visit the general discussion haha.

raverboy

[nardAJC]

it's cool. i left it open because of the numerous replies... just nominate me for coolest moderator when you visit the general discussion haha.

raverboy

No worries mate- and thankyou!

[Illusional]

drinking beer works for me, however drinking more beer works wonders for me. BUT i'll let you decide on that one.

raverboy

[Junket]

Whatever, I fixed the multiple thread problems.

Go drink your beer.

[nardAJC]

drinking beer works for me, however drinking more beer works wonders for me. BUT i'll let you decide on that one.

raverboy

hahaha! I tried that too (I do feel a little guilty drinking but)....Even though it gives me more courage and I will approach the girls, I make a complete fool of myself saying silly, inappropriate things. And, above all, even though I am intoxicated, it is clear that my social skills are greatly lacking......One girl once said "You would have a lot of potential if you learnt some social skills'

In what way does it work for you...? Does it help with the initial approach, or the subsequent conversations, possibly intimate connection?