The wedding is off

[Bella82]

Yes she says I should have picked up on her detaching herself from me but that's kinda hard to do when she is still telling me she loves me. Is still going along with the wedding stuff. Still kissing my goodnight etc.

Unfortunately I've been in this situation before when I was younger and I've been the one that didn't speak up when something was bothering me. Don't take her being mean to you as something you've done to deserve it. She could be upset at herself for letting things go the way the did and it comes out this way. If it has taken her this long to decide to call off the wedding, take this as her final decision and move on. I would be thankful that she didn't stay with you longer, after you got married, while still deciding if you were right for her or not.

When she says you should have picked up on her detaching herself.. that is BS! She took the easy way out - not dealing with issues as they came up, and just calling it quits.

Be thankful that she told you now and you didn't end up marrying her.

[lahnnabell]

I think men could all use lessons on how to read situations like this. There are usually tell-tale signs that occur BEFORE the actual break up, but some people are just clueless. One of the main issues I read on here time and time again is, "My girlfriend left me! I had no idea she was unhappy!" In some cases, I've read guys that very blatantly ignore their partner's requests for more quality time, or more this or that. Then the woman gets fed up trying to make things work on her own and leaves. I've had a couple of guys do this to me. We would go in circles talking about our issues and we'd try to execute plans to better our relationship. But when push came to shove, they call crapped out on me again and again, leaving me with the dirty work. And then they have the nerve to bitch and cry when I'm on my way out the door.

Ultimately, yes, it is up to the unhappy person to speak up about their feelings. However, it couldn't hurt to have a person who is a little more in-tune to your frequency either. A lot of women really like a guy that can read a little more into her emotions. I'm not saying you have to read minds, but if you're so blinded by this, I say also take a look at your own behavior and see if you can learn from it.

[RayzrShrp]

Well now it makes sense. She is hooking up with my best friend. Nice huh?