Girlfriend for 3 years went out with another guy?

[ChicagoBound]

I think it really depends on what her intentions were when she was hanging out with this guy. Was she doing it thinking "I'm getting away with this" or was she just looking for some conversation and maybe a little ego boost? Most of the women I know need attention in some way---if they aren't getting it from their boyfriends, most will seek it from other avenues...flirting with the cashier at the supermarket just to see if he'll flirt back, etc. If she felt insecure because you weren't giving her enough attention, and she went out with this guy never planning to be dishonest, and also never planning on doing anything with him, maybe she just needed to feel like someone wanted her, appreciated her etc.

I don't think she really "cheated" on you unless she did something physically with this guy, or told him she also had feelings for him. I say you talk it out, but let her know this is a one time chance, and next time if she's feeling like she needs attention, she needs to come to you for it.

[VincenzoG91]

The "smothering" is my fault, there were points in our relationship when I was overly suspicious of her. I'd call her asking where she was - i know, not good.
If my suspisions that time were correct, i wouldn't know. She said the going out only happened recently.

Past suspicious behavior, current suspicious behavior... you probably have a cheater on your hands.

[ali3775]

I think the girl is genuinely sorry and has realised how much she loves you. I'd give her a chance and hear her out, everything happens for a reason and if you where taking her for granted then how can you be surprised at this. A relationship works both ways and you get out of a relationship, what you put into it.

[IncognitoSir]

I think the girl is genuinely sorry and has realised how much she loves you. I'd give her a chance and hear her out, everything happens for a reason and if you where taking her for granted then how can you be surprised at this. A relationship works both ways and you get out of a relationship, what you put into it.

So what you're saying is because of what he's done she "gives back" to him some random dates with some guy mixed in with some real shady actions? Man, get rid of this chick, playing games and sounds like she just making up shit to cover her own ass. Don't be a sucka bro.