she's a sleaze!

[feelslikeido]

i'm bored of her conversation always being about sex. there's only so long in a day that you can discuss and laugh about the same subject. she works in politics, plays semi-pro netball and loves sculpture and languages. she's got every avenue for stimulating discussion one could possibly want, yet there's an air of sleaze about her...

...to me it seems lke the opposite of what you guys are all saying.. i reckon SHES just in it for the sex..

she likes me a lot and doesn't get what i'm talking about when i bring it up... neither does anyone on this forum :S

[Gratedwasabi]

i'm bored of her conversation always being about sex. there's only so long in a day that you can discuss and laugh about the same subject. she works in politics, plays semi-pro netball and loves sculpture and languages. she's got every avenue for stimulating discussion one could possibly want, yet there's an air of sleaze about her...

...to me it seems lke the opposite of what you guys are all saying.. i reckon SHES just in it for the sex..

she likes me a lot and doesn't get what i'm talking about when i bring it up... neither does anyone on this forum :S

I'm going to try one last time to help you understand the basic concept here, although I'm beginning to think it's a lost cause to try.

You two are not compatible. She probably spends enough time with sculpture and language and politics and wants to have fun and joke around when she's not working or with her friends who probably only like to discuss that stuff.

It doesn't matter if you have fun sometimes or you like things about her.. when you're coming on forums calling her names and complaining about her basic behavior that will NOT CHANGE, you need to just end it.

How she IS, forever, is not what you want. The reason she doesn't get it is because it's just how she is. It's like trying to explain to a fish how swimming in water is bad behavior. She's a fish. You're a cat. You hate water. She loves it. Get it?

[MerryH]

What is it that you think we don't understand? She's got a mouth like a sailor and you don't like it. It's pretty simple to get. Everyone here has told you that you should break up with her because your personalities don't match. Apparently this isn't what you want to hear. So what is it that you want us to tell you?

[feelslikeido]

where i'm from we work to resolve things, not dissolve a relationship due to minor differences. it's called diplomacy and i'm not at all surprised that those struggling to grapple with the concept are Americans.

maybe i'm barking up the wrong tree: asking for relationship advice from a bunch of fragile nerds was a bad idea to begin with.

let tell you what i really want. I like this girl a lot I want a way to resolve (not dissolve) this issue. I want to either understand how she came to be potty mouthed, or to somehow get myself into some sort of mindset so that i can tolerate it and understand it. the perfect solution (for me) would be if she could just stop speaking like a sailor, but i'm willing to tolerate it but i'm just wondering how. If other relationships can survive language barriers, disability, financial stress etc etc then I don't see why one little thing has to end my relationship... you guys are all just about "breaking up and finding someone else"... bunch of melodramatics if you ask me.

[Gratedwasabi]

where i'm from we work to resolve things, not dissolve a relationship due to minor differences. it's called diplomacy and i'm not at all surprised that those struggling to grapple with the concept are Americans.

maybe i'm barking up the wrong tree: asking for relationship advice from a bunch of fragile nerds was a bad idea to begin with.

Wow. You're a schmuck. Minor differences? You came on a message board to call your girlfriend sleazy and that she bores and embarrasses you in equal measure. Here in America we have a word for what you are; douchebag. Look it up.

[feelslikeido]

ok we just talked and she confirms that she's "changed" (I said that change wasn't necessary but just if she could be understanding to this aspect of my personality and be sensitive toward it) and that she'd expect that I'd do the same for her (which I've done in the past on at least 2 important issues, and can/will do in the future).

option 1: break up. option 2: show understanding and compromise.... all you wanna do is tell me to break up.

I came on here for some constructive ADVICE, not to call her sleazy (when I call her a sleaze i say it to her face I don't need to come on here to tell her that).

[girl68]

not dissolve a relationship due to minor differences.maybe i'm barking up the wrong tree: asking for relationship advice from a bunch of fragile nerds was a bad idea to begin with.

This is not a "minor" difference. This is a crucial personality clash- it can't be fixed. In fact it's already pretty aweful that you called her a sleaze.

[MerryH]

ok we just talked...

Yeah? Did you tell her that you're bored with her outside of the bedroom, that seeing her is "hard work" and that you find it difficult to take her out to dinner and buy her flowers?

when I call her a sleaze i say it to her face

You're a real catch, you know that? I feel even more strongly now that you should break up with her, not because of any of her traits, but yours. You are a colossal Australian and don't deserve a girlfriend.

[feelslikeido]

This is not a "minor" difference. This is a crucial personality clash- it can't be fixed. In fact it's already pretty aweful that you called her a sleaze.

she grew up in a big city, i grew up in a small country town. they talk openly about sex in big cities. they don't talk openly about sex in small country towns. so what the hell is wrong with trying to understand one another before ending everything?

[girl68]

100 bucks says you won't overcome this.

edit...

but goodluck.

[feelslikeido]

You are a colossal dickhead and don't deserve a girlfriend.

i just wanna set standards. might marry/have kids one day and don't want the kids taking our ball-gag in for show-and-tell. is there something wrong with wanting to set a decent example by promoting a BALANCED sex life, not sex 24/7.

[MerryH]

Oops, you quoted me. I guess editing my post was pointless.

Anyway, this wasn't about your sex life, it was about you being bored of her and embarrassed by how she speaks. Sounds healthy! You have my blessing. Good luck with your broken relationship!

[feelslikeido]

this wasn't about your sex life

discussing sex is for the bedroom. it's not to be discussed all day long while eating ice cream, walking the dog, or visiting your grandmother. it has it's place and that's the bedroom. the execption is for education or health purposes and that's perfectly fine. making dirty jokes about dirty sanchez and the like is unflattering and unnecessary, and it does little to cultivate romance or intimacy.

this have everything to do with my sex life as it's becoming invasive and entering every other aspect of my life. I'm just trying to put it in it's rightful place.

[feelslikeido]

seems as though everyone on here is vindictive and all about jumping ship. does anyone know how to save a relationship or are you just experts on how to end them?

[IncognitoSir]

I tell ya what you do, FWB.....that is all.