gf's scary email ... pls help!!!

[MynameisJesus]

I agree about communication! But that's not the point. This girl complained several times about how nice and respected she is being treated. Why would somebody complain about getting "too much respect"?! I didn't get it. Maybe she is into bad boys or wants some aggression?

Oke now I see your point. Here's my interpretation: Her complaint about how nice he is means that he's pushing things too hard and it doesn't come natural for her. I realize that OP would do anything for his girlfriend but doing everything for somebody doesn't make it all natural and has adverse effects. I compare it to the relationship between me and my dad (which is not a romantic one lol)
My dad makes my breakfast, asks me when I'm coming to bed, picks me up at 5am after clubbing, takes a day off at work when I'm sick. He's amazing but it's not healthy and it's unnatural. He is overconcerned and a control freak. I'm pretty positive that this is what's going on in OP's situation and I understand the female point in this story too

A relationship is a healthy balance of giving and taking. Not give give give give so that the partner is pleased. You have to have a fight sometimes or be selfish sometimes. I know a lot of needy couples, calling each other every day and watching their every move. It works for some years and then one of them realizes it's not very natural and they start 2nd guessing.

The woman has been brave to admit this. It took guts to do that and I'm sure she has never had bad intentions with OP

[IncognitoSir]

Sounds like she doesnt KNOW what she wants and she wants everything here way. I bet she likes the bad boys that use her for sex and talk to her like she's worthless. You have to let her learn the hard way. That means breaking up, and no contact, especially when she reaches out for you to save her ass in the future. Tell her to go find what she wants!

[Alliance]

She currently out of town on a ski trip with her cousin.

I sent her an email, basically responding to hers...
I told her I'm not mad at her, and that her concerns are very valid ones. I briefly addressed them. I told her we can take it slow, if she doens't wanna get married yet.

I told her what I thought, and how we have a very loving relationship and how we can make it even better.

I also mentioned how I admit my mistakes, and gonna make some changes, such as introducing her more thoroughly to my family and my friends, and bring her more into my life.


she followed up by emailing me back, and tells me shes been ill lately. says shes been having fun. She also gave me her cousin's number, and says she will talk to me later face to face when she comes back.


Is this a good sign, or has she already made up her mind and just tell me her peice face to face? *shudder* ... can I still save this?

what should I do for the time being, and when she comes back?

[sadie_genie]

There is nothing wrong with you. I would love a guy who treats me as nice and never change. The problem is her; she takes what you have to offer for granted.

What does a guy have to do? When he treats her badly, she whines about what a jerk he is and then when she treats her nicely like the OP does, she says he's too nice.