does she or doesn't she....

[neverknow]

Yea I know, I think once I hear back from her again I'll see if maybe she wants to get together for lunch sometime, that's innocent enough right? Lol my thinking is she didn't really have much to say, which makes it good that she did take the time to email me even though she didn't have anything to say...am I right in assuming that?

[violingirl]

For heaven's sake, stop torturing yourself and ask her out! The worst she could do is say no. Then you'd at least know where you stand with her. Tell her you'd love to hear all about her new job...could she meet you for coffee sometime soon.

[sunflower77]

Agree with what violingirl said, just ask her out, analysing her every move will never really allow you to decide whether she likes you or not and if she likes you like a friend or possibly something more. Go for it already, thats whats so fun about dating, you never know what will happen exactly

[neverknow]

I know I know, but I kinda want to see what she says when/if she replies back. I want to see what exactly she puts, Cuz her last few days at work even though I asked where she was going to be working she never gave me a company name or anything, so that's what made me think I wouldn't hear from her. Then I do but its a short email that basically said good luck in life lol. But a friend of mine made a good point that it was late at night when she emailed me and that may be why she used my email and not my number, anyways I want to see if she's more open with me later. If she's more receptive then I think I'll do it

[neverknow]

Its been almost two weeks since I first heard from her. I emailed her again on Wednesday I think it was, and asked about her job and asked if she wanted to hang out or grab lunch or something. So hopefully I'll hear from her soon. I could use it, had a rough week kinda, with this being part of it :/

[neverknow]

OK so this morning I woke up and had an email from her. I open it, excited to see her emailing me, And first line of the email says "you don't need to know where I work." She then goes on to say she'll stop by my work sometime but not now, and that she's on vacation. The email is very jumbled and kind of off, but I figure that's just cuz my stomach dropped when I read that sentence. I show the email to a friend, And she thinks that its a drunk email and I shouldn't get so upset. Now that I re-read it, it does seem like it was a drunk email, especially since she's on vacation. But I'm just so confused, its hard to get the tone of what someones writing in text. She could have been just teasing me, or could've just meant exactly what she wrote. My friend reminds me she wouldn't have emailed me if she didn't at least think of me as a friend, but I didn't ask for her social security number or anything, I just asked where She was going to be working...that's a question anyone would ask someone who is just starting a new job. I dunno, maybe she doesn't see me as a friend, or maybe she did drunk email me. Fml someone shoot me and put me out of my misery

[wolfie91]

My gut reaction: time to cut and run. If she calls or emails to clarify that it was a drunken email, I would hear her out, but otherwise that seems pretty clear to me.

[Cerby]

Yea I know, I think once I hear back from her again I'll see if maybe she wants to get together for lunch sometime, that's innocent enough right? Lol my thinking is she didn't really have much to say, which makes it good that she did take the time to email me even though she didn't have anything to say...am I right in assuming that?

I read the whole thread, but this post stood out to me the most. There was simply too much second guessing and reading into this situation. As an ex-overweight guy myself, and 26, near your age, I know what the low confidence is like, but I've also learned to pull the trigger when I have to. Seeing that it was almost 2 weeks before you followed up, any lingering feelings that might have built up would have all but disappeared on her end.

I would have had the adrenaline push and asked her out on her last day when I gave the number. Saying things like "keep in touch" aren't the way to pick up girls, they just give all the power to them.

This is a tough lesson, if you had gone for it, you would have felt the quick sting of rejection and then began to move on, easily because she is out of you life. Instead you have allowed yourself a slow painful death over weeks and weeks that still ended with the same result - rejection.

If it were me, I'd draft up a wicked email (unless I had her number, then I'd balls up and call her), and tell her what you need to. No more "stay in touch" crap, that does nothing for nobody in the dating world.

[Bonfire]

Even if it's a drunken email, people tend to say what's really on their mind when they are drunk. So the fact that she said "you don't need to now where I work" that is basically saying she doesn't see you as close enough friend to divulge such information. When she emailed you, she is just being nice to a former co-worker. I think she didn't mean to lead you on but you are taking it as such. I would recommend you back off from her at this point and don't contact her. If she feels guilty about being so blunt to you in that email, she'll send another one. Otherwise, if she never contact you again. Then she is obviously never interested in the first place. Don't take it so hard... plenty of fish in the sea.

[neverknow]

I read the whole thread, but this post stood out to me the most. There was simply too much second guessing and reading into this situation. As an ex-overweight guy myself, and 26, near your age, I know what the low confidence is like, but I've also learned to pull the trigger when I have to. Seeing that it was almost 2 weeks before you followed up, any lingering feelings that might have built up would have all but disappeared on her end.

I would have had the adrenaline push and asked her out on her last day when I gave the number. Saying things like "keep in touch" aren't the way to pick up girls, they just give all the power to them.

This is a tough lesson, if you had gone for it, you would have felt the quick sting of rejection and then began to move on, easily because she is out of you life. Instead you have allowed yourself a slow painful death over weeks and weeks that still ended with the same result - rejection.

If it were me, I'd draft up a wicked email (unless I had her number, then I'd balls up and call her), and tell her what you need to. No more "stay in touch" crap, that does nothing for nobody in the dating world.

well I emailed her back the first time the same day, then it was about a week and a half when I emailed her again asking how her job was going. I already emailed her again basically saying i was just checking on how she was doing and to say hi whenever she wants to. I think I've already given up on anything happening with her, i at least thought we may become friends, but that email may show thats not the case. this chicks been sending me mixed signals forever, sometimes she'd act happy to see me, other times not so much. it just confused the hell out of me, cuz she didn't have to hug me, she couldve taken my info and never contacted me. she didnt have to email me, so wtf, why email me if she doesn't want to be friends? whats the point? i need a beer...

[neverknow]

well she just emailed me again, basically saying she does miss talking to me and some other people too but she had to quit, and that she'll come in sometime to say hi but she doesnt know when. wtf? jesus christ i never know with this chick (get the name now lol?) i guess whenever she comes in i can ask why she doesn't want me to know. i dont know...you women will be the death of me

[MerryH]

i guess whenever she comes in i can ask why she doesn't want me to know.

You're going to ask her why she doesn't want you knowing where she works? Please don't. She basically told you it's none of your business, so don't keep trying to get in her business. She doesn't like you. It's done. Move on.

And might I suggest, in the future, just go for it. You agonized over this for weeks when it could have been avoided.

[Bonfire]

I think you should ask her out directly, no more beating around the bush. That way it's out in the open. She'll either reject you or go out with you. You could save all this time in trying to figure out what's she's thinking. Just do it, man. No more pussyfooting around. You have nothing to lose.

[neverknow]

But how do you ask someone out through email? I've heard through phone or text is bad enough. But really, they're right. She doesn't want me to know where she works. She either lied about something or is embarrassed, or just doesn't want me to visit her or something. Either way, doesn't sound good for dating...chalk another one up under the L column

[Bonfire]

But how do you ask someone out through email?

Simple. Email her "I'm just going to through this out there, would you like to go out with me sometimes?" Click send. That's it. If you are going to just give up on her, might as well do it and see what happens. So what if she rejects you if you send that, you won't see her again really. But at least you know you took a chance. I have the feeling you rarely take chances, why not do it finally.