Is this a date?

[Mark1]

Meaning with compliments?

[MerryH]

Hm? Are you asking if you should compliment her? Flirt instead of giving outright compliments. Compliments are fine to a point, but too much of that can get really awkward.

[Mark1]

Smother as in like compliments? Good, cause I haven't been doing that. Just saying hey to see how her summer was going. Nothing like, "im so excited to see you" or anything like that.

[MerryH]

Smother as in like compliments?

Oh. No, I meant don't smother her with your texts. If responding to you becomes tedious for her or exhausting, then you're going to blow it. Remember that at this point, you're just barely acquaintances so don't get too familiar/close, you know what I mean?

[Mark1]

Yes! Agree 100%.

I'm not good at flirting over text (lol) so I will, for now, leave it as cordial and respectful texts.

Thank you, you have been a big help.

[bulrush]

The others all had good ideas. But be cautious, she might be using her looks to get free dinners and drinks from you. Women do this a lot.

If she wants to date she will do one or more of the following:
- Hold your hand.
- Ask about things YOU like.
- Be concerned with what YOU want, like what drink you want, what food you want, what movie you want to see.
- Kiss you on the lips.
- Sleep with you.

Also be aware she might want a one night stand. A few women are like this, but not many. Just be aware of the possibility.

[Mark1]

^Those sound like things she would do if she wanted a one night stand, no?

[sadie_genie]

Ok...don't get too excited yet. Yes, some girls ask guys out because they are interested, other times they are just looking for someone to hang out with. I have had guyfriends all pissed off telling me how he and this girl have been texting back and forth for awhile now and they always hang out and have dinner and stuff. But then, when he tried to kiss her, she acts all shocked and thought they were just friends. LOL.

Maybe during the date, smile and ask if it is a date. If she acts shocked, say you are just kidding.

[Mark1]

I'm not planning on sleeping with her the first day anyways.

I've been told I will be "able to tell" its a date or not, is this true?

Also, if I figure it is a date, I was going to go for a kiss on the cheek at the end of the night. I'll be too nervous for the lips anyways.

Thoughts?

[Cinnabella]

Omg just get to see her and see what happen, instead of imagination too far away :-O.

[Mark1]

should i text her wishing her a happy fourth? is that weird?

[IndiReloaded]

Wait until after the holiday and send a short msg asking if she had a nice weekend. That opens the door to further discussion (she can describe what she did). The key to successful dating is to match your signs of interest w/hers. Too much makes you look desperate and a turn off. Good luck.

[Mark1]

Wait until after the holiday and send a short msg asking if she had a nice weekend. That opens the door to further discussion (she can describe what she did). The key to successful dating is to match your signs of interest w/hers. Too much makes you look desperate and a turn off. Good luck.

This is a great idea, thanks. What do you mean by the bolded part?

[IndiReloaded]

Its an old idea. If you search for a poster called "Nomas" (a rather bright engineer), he explained several years ago that the way to avoid freaking out a potential partner is to pay attention to their interest signals and match them, very gradually increasing your signs of interest in accordance w/her responses. So if she smiles, smile back. If she sends a short msg with a humourous tone, return the same, don't send an essay proclaiming your love. Its like a dance that helps to develop trust. She will learn you have self-control and confidence. Make sense?

[Mark1]

That makes a lot of sense, yes. I like the dance analogy, rather than me just jumping and texting "hey how are you!"

How does it relate to my situation? Like we can find common ground about what we did over the 4th weekend? like that?