Seriously doubting my decision and need advice...

[vashti]

I think you did the right thing. She went for 6 months without making a good effort at finding a job, and living off you (funny how she said your weren't her father, but expected you to act like one indefinitely). It's not the fact that she was unemployed for 6 months that I find disturbing; it was the lack of motivation to be responsible for herself while living off someone she isn't married to. The fact that she is angry even still, after finding work, tells me she is still not ready to take responsibility for her inaction.

I am pretty traditional about male/female gender roles, but I don't think women should expect to be supported for this length of time by men who haven't married them when they have no children together, unless the man actually wants to do it.

[reltship]

Thanks, Vashti,

You're one of the first people on here that explained pretty much what I had been thinking. I too am pretty traditional in the way I view male/gender roles. I just remember being about five years old and me staying with my grandparents during the day and both my parents working their butts off to make ends meet and make sure they could provide for their family. I rarely saw my dad until I was about 10 years old since he worked two jobs, but after he got himself situated financially, I saw much, much more of him. I want that for my kids and I want to be with someone that works hard. Hobbies are good and healthy to have, but I just found the priorities to not be balanced.

Thanks again.

[sadie_genie]

You made the right decision. She was capable of finding a job but chose to be lazy and inconsiderate. Now, she still does not recognize what she did wrong since she maintained you were an asshole.

[reltship]

Thanks Sadie,

Another point I had forgotten to mention in my previous posts...not only after she moved out did she still maintain I'm an asshole...she took most of the groceries with her as well...right on down to the coffee grinds. She did this despite me having incurred at least 75% of the costs for the first 5 months of groceries on top of everything else. That just had felt like a slap in the face to me...but oh well...

[searock]

From your last 3 posts, OP, it does seem like she was taking advantage of you. Didn't help in the house, basically stole your food when she left... I'm sorry. Oh well, at least you know that you are better off now that she's gone.