questions!

[smackie9]

Ya I'm gonna go with pushy too.

[lamobatsman]

Ya I'm gonna go with pushy too.

ok maybe i was too pushy and came across too needy but surely u can understand me!!: we never talked on the fone or skyped once so u can understand why i wanted to! its normal wen u like someone to want to do that no rather than talk on facebook!??

[lamobatsman]

She got cold and nasty because she felt you were too pushy. Had you just backed off a bit, she wouldn't have gotten cold and nasty.

what would you have guys done when she stood me up for a skype session and didnt even text me saying she was ill and going straight to bed?
she didnt even mention it the next day and forgot we were meant to meet up. im just curious to know how to react to next time to similar situations please?

thanx

[basilandthyme]

what would you have guys done when she stood me up for a skype session and didnt even text me saying she was ill and going straight to bed?
she didnt even mention it the next day and forgot we were meant to meet up. im just curious to know how to react to next time to similar situations please? thanx

Just leave the ball in her court and wait for her to initiate the next contact. If she doesn't contact you again, then you know it's over. If she does contact you but doesn't apologise or offer an explanation, chalk it up as a red mark against her name. If you get too many red marks, then it's time to walk away.

Being pushy won't achieve anything good.

[smackie9]

what would you have guys done when she stood me up for a skype session and didnt even text me saying she was ill and going straight to bed?
she didnt even mention it the next day and forgot we were meant to meet up. im just curious to know how to react to next time to similar situations please?

thanx

Like I posted before.....you never call them again and walk away like a man.

[lamobatsman]

Just leave the ball in her court and wait for her to initiate the next contact. If she doesn't contact you again, then you know it's over. If she does contact you but doesn't apologise or offer an explanation, chalk it up as a red mark against her name. If you get too many red marks, then it's time to walk away.

Being pushy won't achieve anything good.

Being pushy won't achieve anything good.[/QUOTE]

i agree with what people have said on here and that i maybe handled things wrong. you are right being pushy doesnt help. i think also what might have pushed her away was that i used to send her songs on her facebook wall a lot. Do you think that was a bad idea? she said she liked them but maybe it was too much too soon?? cos everyone could see my posts on her wall?!

anyway i have some more questions. sorry i just like to know wat else i shud have done.

1) one week she was being really distant as i said and hardly replied. so i went on fb chat one day and sent her a farewell message and tried to be mature about it. i got a reply from her brother saying it was him and that she was in hospital. so i thought thats why she hasnt been replying me much. i obviously got worried about her and even went to buy her a get well soon card. i asked a mutual friend of ours to ask her mates if she was ok and wat was goin on with her. I then get a nasty message from her saying why are you spreading rumours you are in hospital and that she told me she was visiting her grandma in hospital etc. it was a really rude message.
2) Why is it fine for her to always ask me things like “ Why don’t you write to me today or are you pissed off at me etc”. she used to write things like this wen I didn’t answer her for a cuple of hours or something. She used to say things like why are you late this morning for work, I missed you etc. this was all at the beginning mind before she changed. So if I wrote the same things to her she gets annoyed but she can ignore me and write to me things like that wen I ignore her?!!
3) One day she was ill in bed and I asked her to skype and try to cheer her up even though I had a friend around. She said no its fine il get some rest and write to you later. Later that night she writes me shes goin out clubbing and I said I thought you were ill. She said I got some rest and am better now
Just want to know how u would handle each of these situations

thanx

[basilandthyme]

Your questions are all the same - but just using different words.

The long and short of it is not to bother with a girl who's only half interested in you.

[smackie9]

She is dissin ya dude, you got OCD? Why don't you get the message, she ain't interested in you.

[lamobatsman]

i get what your saying smackie9. but the onyl reason i was confused was cos she said so many thigns to me that made me believe that she reli liked me and maybe she actually did like me and i did something to change that?! and im sure if you were in my position you would have found it difficult to walk away. i turned down some good girls for her man

[smackie9]

Here's a tip that I live by....actions speak louder than words. Anyone can say the right things, words are so easy to say, but if you observe something different in their actions to what they have been saying, what would that tell you? That they have been lying to you. It's a no brainer.

[lamobatsman]

Here's a tip that I live by....actions speak louder than words. Anyone can say the right things, words are so easy to say, but if you observe something different in their actions to what they have been saying, what would that tell you? That they have been lying to you. It's a no brainer.

why am i so hung up over a girl i didnt even date or kiss etc? is there a reason for this feeling?

[lamobatsman]

and everyone says she not interested etc. but at the beginning she was into me. she would reply me all the time even wen she was busy. i must have done something to change the way she was. can i possibly show my conversation to someone whos willing to read it??

[smackie9]

why am i so hung up over a girl i didnt even date or kiss etc? is there a reason for this feeling?

Because you are obsessing, and investing your feelings way too soon. I bet you have put a lot of fantasizing into the mix which makes her into someone she isn't.

And the worst of it is, is that we desire most what we can't have....you not being able to have her has pushed this obsession over the limit. She is like a drug to you....you are so addicted it's messin you up. You can't get that fix, so it's making you become desparate.

[lamobatsman]

Because you are obsessing, and investing your feelings way too soon. I bet you have put a lot of fantasizing into the mix which makes her into someone she isn't.

And the worst of it is, is that we desire most what we can't have....you not being able to have her has pushed this obsession over the limit. She is like a drug to you....you are so addicted it's messin you up. You can't get that fix, so it's making you become desparate.

I think i have to agree with you. i think i should have known form the beginning she werent into me! she told me last month that she met a new guy she really likes and i asked has he taken you out on a date. she said that he came to spend the weekend at her flat after only meeting him once through friends. it goes to show that if a girl likes you that they will want to spend time with you by themselves i guess. i mean he didnt even take her out on a date when they first met jus tthe two of them!!

I should have known this when i was going to fly to see her and she turned around and said im coming to your end actually with a friend. if she wanted to spend tiem with me by oursleves she would have let me fly to see her first.

[smackie9]

This is why you go by their actions, and not by their words.