why is my boyfriend behaving so weird latelly?

[dontaskme]

You gotta be kidding me. You haven't had sex with the guy and he wants to propose to you?

Haven't you heard of test driving the car first before buying it to make sure you are not purchasing a lemon? I guess not.

[lilly2015]

You gotta be kidding me. You haven't had sex with the guy and he wants to propose to you?

Haven't you heard of test driving the car first before buying it to make sure you are not purchasing a lemon? I guess not.

No, Im not Kidding. We never had sex. We Are both very shy, although he is more. He told me he thinks he is rushing me if we get intimate but we already talk about that. Maybe he wants it After marriage. Can be because his family educated him that way. He told to a friend that he is scared of doing Something wrong and i run Away or get mad with him.And yes,he talked with a common friend and asked how he could propose and that he is organizing everything this week and next one. Must be Something big :o

[pcmaster]

Sorry from what country are you? Maybe thats normal where you live. I mean having sex after marriage.

[lilly2015]

Sorry from what country are you? Maybe thats normal where you live. I mean having sex after marriage.

I am mixed:portuguese,japanese,german and english.But I was born in Portugal.My boyfriend is german.

[pcmaster]

That explains things. Was thinking you are Japanese that would explain shyness. Germans are reserved too. Think you are great couple. Kinda big age gap but looks like you both can overcome it. Wish you all the best. God bless your soul.

[TheEvilJester]

Well, define "weird." I mean, everybody has a different definition of weird. The women I've tried to date keep telling me it is weird that I keep victims chained up in my basement. Or that I make furniture out of their bones. Well.... at least the ones who stick around long enough to tell me anything. Most of them just run screaming something about me being a "psycho." They're just uptight, though, if you ask me. :-P

(Sorry. I couldn't resist myself. Since I saw there was plenty of good advice I didn't feel too bad with my nonsensical reply.)

[lilly2015]

Well, define "weird." I mean, everybody has a different definition of weird. The women I've tried to date keep telling me it is weird that I keep victims chained up in my basement. Or that I make furniture out of their bones. Well.... at least the ones who stick around long enough to tell me anything. Most of them just run screaming something about me being a "psycho." They're just uptight, though, if you ask me. :-P

(Sorry. I couldn't resist myself. Since I saw there was plenty of good advice I didn't feel too bad with my nonsensical reply.)

Hahahahaha,you are kidding,right? But yes,some comments can be very mean!!My boyfriend is a lot different from all the guys i met before but he is very special for me!I still dont understand why people always think is bad a couple wait until after marriage!!

[pcmaster]

Because some people think that sex is important. Sometimes after marriage guy or girl find out that sex is just not working because he or she is not suitable with their partner.Since sex is not important to you then you shouldn't care about these things.

[lilly2015]

Because some people think that sex is important. Sometimes after marriage guy or girl find out that sex is just not working because he or she is not suitable with their partner.Since sex is not important to you then you shouldn't care about these things.

I see. Well actually, i heard that couples who wait until marriage have more happy marriage and their bonds become more strong.well, i dont think sex is everything in a relationship. Is important but there are more important things and my bf agrees with me. For some reason he waited 24 years. Almost 25. He said he was waiting for the right girl. But he said he is a lot worried about his law order exam and worried about loosing me.He is always says he feels scared of loosing me.

[pcmaster]

Thats a normal fear your BF have. Will probably go away after marriage.

[lilly2015]

Thats a normal fear your BF have. Will probably go away after marriage.

I hope so. I always tell him that he is the best thing That happened in my life and that he will never loose me. Before him i was in an abusive relationship (but we never got intimate) Where i was threatned. And i was raped when i
was 15.After that i met a wonderful guy Who died in a car crash when i was 16. Lets say i dont get intimate with Someone since my 16 years old. And my bf was the only guy Who understood me and respected me. He never tried anything since we met. He always said we could take things slow because he knows how much i suffered before.

[TheEvilJester]

I think people often do put WAY too much importance on sex. I think that can often times really hinder relationships. Sex IS important, though. If you are not sexually compatible with somebody, it can and probably will lead to problems in the relationship. I guess that is why the thoughts on this seem to have kind of switched in our society these days, and now people seem to almost think it is weird to wait until marriage.

Personally, I admire it. I think it is noble. It would probably be a good idea to at least talk about it, though. Get an idea of what you both like sexually so you can at least have some idea of if you are compatible in that regard. Otherwise, that would be one example of why waiting for marriage could wind up being a mistake in certain situations. It would suck to fall in love and get married only to discover there are huge differences between what you both like sexually that you just cannot get past.

On a side note, I am really sorry to hear about all the rough times you went through. I wish there was something I could say to help, but that is the sort of thing where words just do not do it justice. So, I will just wish you the best. You most definitely do deserve to finally find your happiness. Good luck.

[JohanD]

Has he gotten back to you yet?
I feel like it is something rather positive

[katyk]

I find it interesting (almost amusing) reading the horror in a post that someone hasn't had sex before marriage lol....it wasn't that long ago horror was expressed for the opposite reason! In fact, many cultures do still frown on it so I guess as this is a multi cultural board we should be aware of this. Each to their own is generally my motto. I really am rooting for you Lily and hope it all works out. You both sound so adorable.

[dontaskme]

^^^ Ah, sexual compatibility??? It's a big deal!

Women shouldn't sleep with men unless they are in exclusive relationship. This couple has been together for a long time and is planning to get married. I think it's time to test the water. For all you know,this guy is gay and actually prefers man over a woman, lol!