Help from the big girls..

[Junsui]

Huh? You lost me.

Everyone in the world should just be single or everyone on LF should be single?

[Tone]

The world.

[Junsui]

That would be a lot of single people.

[Tone]

Only for a day or so.

[Junsui]

Maybe





___________________

[artyemi]

well.. that wouldn't solve anything..

i think we're also eager to please the person that we are with.

we compromise in a lot of situation, right? say if we were hanging out with a friend, and want to watch a horror movie, but our friend doesn't like watching horror movie, so we choose to watch a non-horror movie instead.

that doesn't create a problem.. although, with time, we'll call up only the friend who like to watch horror movie to watch horror movie with us and the other friend who doesn't like to watch horrow movie to watch something else..

but i think with a significant other, there's the expectation that perhaps you like to do things with that person, and that person should compromise occasionally, especially when he/she is likely to compromise if he/she is hanging out with his/her friends.

you get?

[TAVS]

Very wise Artemi

[Tone]

I didn't say it would solve anything.

[artyemi]

right tone.. what i meant to say was the activity recommendation wouldn't help me find the answer to the question i have.

[Ratfish256]

Im almost the same. Or at least used to be. This time around I told myself to just shut the hell up for once and go with the flow, It seems to be working well.

(not shut up as in not speak, but my inner me telling the other more tightass inner me to shut up) (yes there are two inner me and I am not crazy... yet... )

[artyemi]

This whole shut the hell up thing I feel is a huge compromise. Say there's this guy, and for a while, I'm really into him, and I really want a relationship with him, but he kept saying no, and no, and no, and no.
And then, something happens, say, a sexual encounter.
To shut hell up and to go with the flow would mean continuing in this sexual type of relationship, sort of being together without really being together, without a clear definition. Just the compromise in value is too much..
But I don't know.. what I'm trying to argue is that oftentimes, compromise feels too much.. it's at the expense of someone's happiness and can lead to a person being more insecure about him/herself.
If this person suggest an activity, and the partner turns it down, again, and again, and again, it can really be strenuous because one would start thinking which is this person doing this, and start to doubt whether the person enjoys being around one as much..

[Tone]

I know - I was just being stupid in your thread, sorry Arty ;[

[artyemi]

It's okay, tone! you're allowed to be stupid every now and again

[Tone]

You're too good to me. ^_^